Your Boyfriend Snaps in the Car

Transcript

Okay, we're here. Hmm? But, I thought you wanted burritos.

Okay, fine, Mexican food. Burritos are Mexican. Okay, so you don't want to eat here.

Well, then where do you want to eat? I'm good with whatever. I was happy eating here.

Hmm, but I thought you didn't want to. You obviously care. Okay, okay, let's take a deep breath and just think for a second.

Reassess. Do you see anything around here that you might be interested in? Okay, but do you see anywhere that you want to go? Can you stop saying that? Because you do! You fucking do! If you didn't, we wouldn't still be sitting in the fucking car! Oh my god, I'm not even yelling.

Listen, I just, I find it frustrating when you suggest something, then after I agree to it, you change your mind. Oh my god, that's not what I'm saying. You're allowed to change your mind, but, like, come on.

You couldn't decide you didn't want to eat here before we arrived? Am I fucking wrong or are burritos not Mexican? Then what do you want? Babe, no, stop, stop.

When I try to speak to you calm, you say you don't know. Then when I start to get annoyed, you say I'm yelling. Stop it, please.

Can you just make a goddamn decision so we can fucking go home? Of course you don't. Exactly what it sounds like.

You haven't made a decision this far, so why would you start now? It's fucking food! It doesn't have to be hard.

If you don't like it, you spit it out and we go somewhere else. Like, it doesn't have to be this deep. It's really not that big a deal.

Who cares if you're wrong? I don't give a fuck. Like, this is such a non-issue.

Baby, really? When have I ever not found something I wanted to eat on a menu? Answer the question.

Of course you can't, because there literally isn't a time I always find something I like or something that I'm excited to try even. But at the same time, like, that doesn't matter. Like, we don't always have to try new places and I'm not going to be upset if we go to the same place a few times when I'm supposed to be unhappy that we found a place that we like.

I'm not asking you where you want to go because I don't care. Like, I want you to have a good time. I know I'm going to have a good time no matter what.

I know I'm going to find something I like. I just want you to have a good time. That's the reason why I care so much.

I just want to know you'll find something you'll like. You know, I'm not the picky one after all. What? Come on, you're kind of picky.

A little bit. I mean, to be fair, the whole reason we're still in the car is because you haven't decided on where you want to go. That sounds at least a little bit picky to me.

Bam. I swear to God, if you say it's fine one more fucking time. You're super annoying, you know that? Haha.

Mmm, I hate you so much. No, no, it's fine. I actually really liked the pasta the last time we went, so.

I don't know, maybe I'll try the chicken parm. I remember last time I couldn't decide between the two, so. It's really not a big deal.

Why do you think I would care if we go to the same place as last time? But, I'm not the one that said I wanted Mexican, you are. Oh, babe, you're so annoying.

Oh, fuck. No, I love you. Oh no, it's really okay.

Just be honest with me, okay? But you weren't, though. Last time you said you didn't care when you went to a place that you were less than enthusiastic to go into.

You just drank water and, like, barely touched your food. After spending a long-ass time to order, only to be disappointed. That's okay, too.

Tell me all the places you want to go and then I'll decide. You know, give me some options to choose from, some sure-fire wins. Give me a good place to start.

We'll figure it out together. Hm. It's okay to not like things.

You just have to tell me, okay? Don't worry about it. It's really not a big deal.

But put on your seatbelt. I'm fucking hungry. Let's get out of here.

Oh, man.