You May Not Think You Deserve Affection, But You Do

Transcript

I woke up thinking about you again, it happens more often than I'd like to admit. It's innocent enough most of the time, I just think of lying there, as the sun comes up, you sleeping next to me, my hands on your body, holding you, letting you sleep, not wanting to wake you up, but also, wanting to wake you up. I crave your attention, you should know that, I think you know that.

Not just in a sexual way of course, but also very much in a sexual way, but I want more than that, and it's hard for me to express, it makes me feel silly, self-conscious to be so vulnerable, to say that I want your attention, but I want you to want me, not just for my cog, not just because you know that I can fuck you better than anyone else, but because you want to be with me, you like talking to me, you want to know what I'm doing, you want to know my thoughts on things, you want to share your thoughts and your feelings, you want to turn to me when you're feeling stressed, depressed, when you're feeling downed, not because you're looking for a hero, or some chivalrous knight to come in and rescue you, I'm nobody's hero, but because you trust me, because you crave intimacy, real intimacy, emotional intimacy, something beyond the physical, though the physical is great too. I know my voice does things to you, I know sometimes these scenarios I create, they cause a response to, for lack of better terms, I know I can make you ache, but that's not real, listening to my voice, some fantasy about, I don't know, your boyfriend, or the opposite end of the spectrum, some vile, dirty fantasy, something you crave, just because I express that, that's not real, that's just, I don't know, I don't know, I don't know, I don't know, I almost use the word hard, but it's not, it's just fun, it's just me expressing my creativity, or telling you what you want to hear, telling lots of people what I think they want to hear, sometimes I'm right, more often than not lately I'm wrong. I don't want you to crave the fantasy, I want you to crave me, I want that attention, I fucking need that attention, as much as I sometimes think I don't, or that I need to do without it, maybe I need to move on, then I wake up thinking about you again, it's a bit of a vicious cycle, wanting someone, I always try to be gentle when there are people who are into me, because I give a lot of attention in life, right, I put out a safe, but also not so safe energy, I guess, that people are drawn to, and I try to appreciate their feelings and let them down easy, but I know how it feels, I know how it feels to crave, to need to want somebody, to not feel like I can express it in the right way, to not be able to get through to you, in your mind you think I'm just fantasizing, the same way I think everyone listening to me is just fantasizing about someone in the picture in their head, some idea that I've put out there, you think I idealize you, that I've put you on a pedestal, that I only see the best parts, or what I want to see, that I don't see what you consider your faults, but that's not the truth, the truth is that everyone has flaws, and I'm sure yours are unique, everybody's are, I just accept you as you are, and I don't want to be a part of you, because everything that's gone into making you the person you are today is part of you, and I'm drawn to you, I need you, I need to be close with you, I want our bodies to be one, I want our minds to be one, as close as that can be to reality, I want to feel your weight on me, I want to slip inside you, I can fucking feel it, I want to feel your lips on me where they belong, my lips on you, on your face, your neck, your shoulders, your breath, I think you want it, I think you need it too, I don't know why you deny yourself, maybe you feel like you don't deserve it, maybe you feel like you have too many other obligations in life, maybe you feel like you're not in a place to accept affection, but you deserve it, you deserve to be touched by me, you deserve this hard cock deep inside you, my arms around you, while we move together, fuck, I want you, I want you to tell me you want me too, oh, it sounds so silly to say it out loud, but that's what I crave, I crave your open affection, I want that almost as much as I want to fuck your brains out, oh god, but I'm touching my cock right now and thinking about it, the fucking your brains out part, about talking about our feelings, about kissing, about touching, about making love, as cheesy as that sounds, I want you to tell me you want me too, I want my bare cock deep inside you, my body's moving together, you want that don't you kiddin', you want it just as much as I do don't you, oh god, I want to come deep inside you, that's something you want right, you want me thrusting away, timing my release, so I can come with you, so I can fill you up, oh, I need it, oh fuck I need you, I need you, I need you so bad, oh fuck, oh fuck, I want you to touch yourself and think of me, oh I want it so bad, I don't want you to ever come again without thinking of me, oh fuck, I know that's fucking possessive, maybe even creepy, but I just can't help it, I'm being honest, I just, oh god, I want to come so hard, oh fuck, I just want you to come with me, I want you to come on my cock, I want to look you in the eyes, I want to kiss you, I want to hold you, I want to tell you that you're mine, and I'm yours, I want to hold you all night, I want to hold you all night, oh god, I'm so fucking close, oh fuck, oh fuck princess, oh fuck baby, fuck, fuck, I came so hard just for you, god, big time, oh fuck, oh fuck, drops of cum just dripping out of my cock, all meant for you, you need it baby, oh, and I need it to be in here, I need it so bad.