Unsure What To Say

Transcript

You have one unheard message. First unheard message. Oh, um.

.. I don't know why, but I somehow thought you were going to answer. Okay, well.

.. Since I'm already talking, I guess I should. ..

I guess I should finish my thought to your. .. your voicemail.

So incredibly uncomfortable, by the way. Um. ..

It's me. In case you didn't get that. Uh.

.. I know it's been a while since we. ..

since we talked. But, um. ..

I was just going through some things. Putting some things in boxes. I'm getting ready to move, actually.

And, uh. .. I came across a few things that belong to you.

So I thought I would. .. call and, uh.

.. and see if you wanted them. ..

before I box them up. Um. ..

I didn't know this was going to be so hard. Wow. It's been.

.. It's been months. I guess that's what breakups are.

Hard. Uncomfortable. Um, I hope you're doing good.

Uh. .. I.

.. stopped paying attention to your social media, so I don't actually know what's going on with you. Um.

.. There's a lot going on with me. I don't know if you follow my stuff, but, um.

.. I'm. ..

moving across the country. As I said, I'm moving, so I'm packing. But, uh.

.. I got a really awesome job offer, and there's just no reason for me not to take it now. Um.

.. It's actually that one that I turned down, um. ..

last year. Because I didn't wanna. ..

I didn't wanna go. But they came back, and they. ..

they made the offer again, and, um. .. there's just no reason not to, you know? So, I gave up my apartment, and I said goodbye to my friends, and in two weeks, I will be.

.. moving. Wow.

It kinda just hit me that you're not gonna be across town anymore. I didn't think about that. I mean.

.. I guess I knew when I decided to do this that that would be the case, and actually, when I made the decision, it was probably a selling feature, if I'm being completely honest, but. ..

now that I'm sitting here looking at. .. looking at your sweater, the really soft one that I used to steal all the time, that.

.. was way too big for me, and the sleeves covered my hands, and you always used to get angry that you could never find it, and it was always in my laundry. Um.

.. I've got it in my hands, and I'm. ..

as I'm looking at it, I. .. it's just kinda hitting me that you're.

.. you're not gonna be just five minutes away anymore. You're gonna be.

.. 3,000 miles. And that's.

.. That's what. ..

that's the way it's supposed to be, though, isn't it? It's supposed to be like that? I mean.

.. That's why we broke up, so that we weren't supposed to be that close? I don't know.

Do you still think about it? Oh, stupid question. Probably not.

You've probably moved on and found somebody else. Which, I mean, I hope. ..

I hope for your sake that's what happened, but. .. Somewhat selfishly, I'm kinda hoping it's not.

At least not yet. It just feels so soon. I mean, don't get me wrong, I'm not, you know, pining away, obviously, but.

.. Doesn't it feel like there should be, like a. ..

a period of respect for what was? Hm. Maybe that's what's in my mind, what I've been thinking the past few months.

I don't know. Wow, I'm clearly rambling. I should not have had a glass of wine before I called you.

Um, anyway, I. .. I have, um.

.. I have your sweater, and, uh. ..

There's a couple of games here, and, actually, that one, you weren't finished, so I'm surprised you haven't asked for that back. Um, there's. ..

Just, you know, basic stuff. You have a lot of socks here. I don't remember you ever taking your socks off that much, but I have, like, six pair of them.

So, I guess you did. Weird thing to give back, but they're yours, so. ..

And they're nice, I mean, they're warm, so you may as well come get them, or I can drop them off, or whatever. Um. ..

Your one electric razor is here, as well. I'm actually kind of surprised you haven't asked for that back, too. Because I remember when you bought that, you had been going back and forth about the one to get, and you finally landed on this one, so you must be using your old one.

Or you're going full-on, you know, beard and mustache, and. .. You always teased you were going to do that.

Maybe. Anyway, it's a nice set, so. ..

Again, you may as well have it back. I don't have any use for it. Um.

.. There's just, you know, this kind of thing. There's also, um.

.. A couple of things I'm not sure if you want. That, uh.

.. Well. ..

Wow, this is awkward. That you gave me. And I don't know how you feel about me keeping them, or you wanting them back.

Um. .. I never really knew what to do with that.

The whole gift thing. I mean, little silly things are one thing, but that necklace you got me last Christmas was fairly expensive, so I don't know if you want to take that back. Um.

.. Uh. ..

The, uh. .. The PS4 that you bought for me, but I think you actually bought it just so there would be one at my apartment to play.

Um. .. You can have that if you want it.

I don't really use it anymore. Um. ..

Just. .. Silly things.

But. .. Anyway, I don't know.

I'm rambling. I think it's because I just don't know what to do with this. You always knew how to stop me from rambling, so this might have been easier if I'd actually gotten to speak to you.

But for all I know, you're screening your calls and you just don't want to talk to me, so that could be. .. Oh God, I hope that's not what's happening.

Um. .. If it is, I'm sorry.

I just. .. Um.

.. Anyway, uh. ..

Like I said, I'm leaving in two weeks, so if you wanna. .. If you wanna connect and, uh.

.. I can give this stuff back, or. ..

Or if you wanna. .. Arrange for me to leave it somewhere and I.

.. I can do that. You can pick it up.

Um. .. We still have a few friends in common that I'm sure would help with that, so that's up to you.

The idea of that, though. .. Of having to leave your stuff with somebody else just so you don't have to see me.

.. A few months ago, that would have been my. ..

My first choice. It's probably why I haven't done this yet, but. ..

Now I don't know. Yep, definitely wasn't ready to make this phone call. Um.

.. Okay. I gotta.

.. I gotta stop rambling. I gotta get my shit together here.

Um, anyway. I have your stuff, and. ..

I'm sure there's crap of mine that I left at your place, too. I can't think of anything, though. Um.

.. I was always kind of, you know, anal about my clothing, so I don't think I left anything. The only thing I can think of is, like, shampoo and stuff, but you can get rid of that if you haven't already, so.

.. Um. ..

Yeah, just, um. .. Text me, call me.

You obviously have the number. Um. ..

Yeah. I think that's it. I don't.

.. I don't really have anything else to say, but I don't want to hang up, either. Okay.

Alright. I'm gonna hang up, because I have a million things to do, but. ..

I hope I hear from you. I hope we can. ..

I don't know. Bury the hatchet or something before I go. I mean, if not, I get it, but.

.. I just feel like. ..

I don't know, call me crazy, but I feel like you would have come back and asked for this stuff if you never wanted to see me again, just to get it over with. Maybe I'm wrong. Anyway.

.. You know how to find me, so. ..

Give me a call. Bye. End of message.

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