❤️ 🎤 The Girlfriend Podcast (1) 🎤 ❤️ (F4M) (Girlfriend Invites You on Her Podcast) (Cutesy Rambling)

Transcript

Hello, and welcome back to the podcast where I say random things and my boyfriend stares at me like I'm mad. Hello? You're on.

You're officially on. Hello. Have I seen you before? I do not know.

Huh. I'm awkward. I don't know why.

I have a podcast. Why am I being awkward? This is my bubby.

I'm a person and I wanted to come onto the podcast. So I said, yes, you may come onto the podcast. So.

Hello and welcome to the Titi podcast where I say embarrassing things and my boyfriend rolls his eyes at me, but he loves me. So he's here supporting me. Say hello.

You can say hello. You can say hello. Well done.

Well done to the saying hello. Hello. This is very nice.

This is a very nice man. And we invited him here because we need content and also he's very sweet. So I'd introduce you to him.

Hello. You're shy. It's OK.

Is it weird? I think it's weird. I think it's a little bit weird, but we're going to be grown ups about this.

We're going to be adults and we're going to say, hey, we are in our late 20s on a podcast talking about nothing of importance. So maybe 12 people will enjoy it. And I think that's brave and mature.

And also I'm here for the honesty. You know, some people have fulfilling jobs, they have roles in society, and we're just like, no, we're going to sit here with microphones and some water and we're going to talk about things that don't really matter, but they might make somebody giggle. So I'm all here for that.

You're all here for that. Maybe the 12 people listening will be all here for that. And we've done our part.

So what should we talk about? Oh, not me. No, it's a terrible subject.

Because I'm very boring. I am, though. No, no, no.

The thing is, I'm not even embarrassed about it. It's like I don't know why it's ever been shameful to be boring. I am boring and I'm OK with it.

I'm doing this podcast in our living room, in my pajamas. I've got a pillow on my lap. You're laughing at me.

We both know that I'm going to eat too much pizza. I should. Do you know what? I shouldn't eat.

Oh, no, this is too honest. This is where the autism kicks in. OK, I shouldn't tell people this, but you know how normal people, quote unquote normal people, there's no such thing.

Normal people share a pizza, don't they? They share a pizza and they share sides and all that. What do we do? You can tell them.

I'm giving you free reign. No. What? I have my own pizza and you have your own pizza and I finish it and you don't.

But we have to be honest about these things. There's no point living in fantasy. I am not one of those people who gets three bites and is like, oh, stuffed.

It's like, no, where's the rest? I want more. And I just, you know, I used to wish I was one of those people.

I used to wish that I was dainty and petite and like, oh, I'm finished. I'm stuffed. I couldn't possibly.

And it's like, I'm just not. I was a big eater when I was a kid. I'm a big eater now.

I have a butthole. I can't speak, that's why I have a splitthroat, I'm sorry. I have a speech impediment, at least like one.

And I also have a big bum, but it's OK. I go to the gym. It's fine.

But yeah, I eat a lot of pizza, but it's OK. You say it's OK. Say it's OK.

It's fine. You say it's fine. Do not question him.

He is wise beyond years. Whittemar. Do you remember that? In Game of Thrones? Yeah.

You know with Peter Baelish, when he's like, gets progressively more Irish. So he starts off and he's like, Lord Stark, like very Southern English. He just gets more and more Irish.

And it's like, I was very fond of Whittemar. Apologies to all Irish people who might be listening. You might be one of the 12.

I'm so sorry. Can't do an Irish accent. Whittemar.

I'd love to. I'd love to do an Irish accent. Have you ever watched Derry Girls? I like Derry Girls.

So good. I love Sister. Is she called Sister Margaret? Michael? Sister Michael? Oh, yeah.

She just does this amazing thing. She's just so dead inside and so done with everyone. She's just like, well, I think it's safe to say we all lost a bit of respect for you there, Claire.

That energy. I wish I had that energy. I'm just far too anxious.

People-pleasing and a little bit pathetic to do that. But I really wish. There's something of that inside me.

I'm just not brave enough or I don't have enough spine. I can't do it. Sometimes, like, I'll think it, but I won't say it.

Because I'm lame. But I'm at one with it. I have to be at one with being boring and being lame.

It's the only way to survive. You can't, you can't change, babes. That's the thing, isn't it? Like, yes, you can improve, but you can't change, really.

I should be a professional speaker. Is that what it's called? No? Motivational speaker? Professional speaker? Well, definitely couldn't be that, anyway.

I professionally speak. You may watch. I don't know! I hope the 12 people who have listened are really enjoying the stuff so far.

So what are we going to talk about today? I've already covered being boring. What else should we talk about? Relationships.

That's a good one. OK, relationships are really hard. Don't try it.

No, relationships are very hard, but there's also a lot of positives that come along with relationships. And that's what you have to keep in mind. It's just that it is easier to be by yourself.

And that to me is just kind of an object. .. Bleh, bleh, bleh.

I can't speak. That is just an objective fact, but that doesn't mean it's better. You know, easier does not mean better.

Easier just means easier. I think I've had a lot of people say to me over the years, like, what do you mean it's easier? It's way harder to be single.

And it's like, no, it's not. No, it is not. It's so, so easy to be single.

And that's not me saying, like, you're not lonely. You are lonely. That is a fact.

But yeah, being single is really easy. You get to watch whatever you want to watch. You get to eat whenever you want to eat.

You can be really weird. Nobody's judging you. Nobody has to find you sexy.

You just come home, you change into your pajamas and you're just like, I am at one with this. And I might be a bit lonely and I might be crying to K-dramas at 3 a.m. But you know what? This is easy.

And being in a relationship, especially at the start of a relationship, you're like, oh, my God, how do I convince you that I am likable? How do I convince you to get naked with me? How do I convince you that I'm a person to create something with, to start a foundation on? How? How do I do it? And I wish I could give somebody advice about this.

I wish it could be some kind of life guru who could be like, you know what, guys, this is how you do it. OK, I've solved it. This is the algorithm.

The answer, whatever. I can't. I honestly, there's nobody less equipped.

OK, I, I don't I don't know how we did it. Do you? Yeah, fair enough, I did say thank you, but no.

I said I liked you and he was like, oh, all right. Let's roll with that, though. It's just I don't honestly think there's a formula.

And I think we think there is one or we hope there is one. We just feel like if someone just explains it to me, just breaks it down and is like, hey, this is what's up. Just do this.

And then, you know, it'll all just happen. It's like, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah. Which is unfortunate because it's like, give me the easy answer.

And it's like, oh, babe, it's life. There is no easy answer. And you're like, fuck.

But yes, relationships are hard. But they are very worthwhile because people or being with people makes you better, I would say. Do you think? Hmm.

I think so. I think when you're by yourself, yes, it's easier and yes, you get to be more selfish and do the things that you just you want to do. But also, I don't really think you get as enriched, if that makes I mean, maybe some people do.

Maybe some people are just really self-motivating and can do it for themselves, and that's really good. I don't personally think I am one of those people. I think I'm a bit needy and a bit like, oh, I need someone to help me have purpose.

So thank you for that. But personally, I think the majority of people work better with other people. I think you can be really introverted and antisocial and still really benefit from other people.

Sorry if that's like basic bitch 101, but that's my two cents. And I think we, surprise, surprise, make it harder for ourselves and for others. We convolute things and complicate and like, hmm, what if it means this? And hmm, what if it means that? And there is a lot of worth in navel-gazing and self-exploration and looking at things, but I think sometimes we're just self-sabotage.

And for the longest time, I really didn't understand that. I was like, why, but why would you make it harder? What, you're you, you're essentially player one.

It doesn't make sense to make things harder. And then I was like, oh, no, there was no like, ah, light bulb moment. I went to counseling, therapy, whatever you call it.

And she was like, you don't seem to like yourself very much. Do you think that could possibly have a bearing on your behavior? And I was like, so is that why I get in my way? She was like, hmm, maybe, think about that.

So yeah. Yeah. Self-sabotaging is not fun and it's so common and we all do it because I think fundamentally we are really scared and being scared is really hard.

It's so uncomfortable. It's so painful and you just want it to end. I think when you're in pain and you're scared, you can't, or at least it's very hard to think past being in pain and being scared.

You just think, get me out. Your fight or flight kicks in. You just think, I don't, I don't want to be here.

I don't want to feel this. Let me out. So self-sabotaging is like, ah, if I just stop talking to this person, I won't have to feel anxious anymore.

Or if I don't try for that job, you know, I won't feel anxious about it. I'm not going to question, oh, am I going to get it or am I not going to get it? And it's just like, ah, quick relief, easy.

And then it's like, yes, you get the relief, but then also afterwards you're like, oh, I've done it again, haven't I? Oh, I just explained my twenties away. Oh, the embarrassment of being a person, it's humiliating.

Really is. It's very, very embarrassing and very cringe. It's like when, whenever somebody like starts dating someone and they talk to me and they're like, oh, it's so embarrassing.

And I'm like, yes, it is so embarrassing. We don't talk about it enough. Movies and media and novels and games, they brainwash us into thinking like, oh no, if it's embarrassing, it's like cutesy embarrassing, but no, it's not.

It is terrifying and humiliating. And I, oh my God, oh my God, oh my God, oh my God. Now they know I burp.

It's like, yes, because they also burp. Why is this so embarrassing? But it is.

Or if you spill something down your face or if you fart or just anything that is totally normal and natural is somehow now just like, oh my God, they're never going to want to kiss me. They're never going to want to hold my hand because it's sweaty. And it's like, yeah, but you know, there's a great chance that their hand is sweaty too, so it's going to be fine.

I wish, wish, wish we could all have that voice that was just like, it's fine, babes. It's fine. You're going to be fine.

I'm so sorry you're on here and I'm just talking so much. I'm sorry. I'm invited you here to just stare at me and shake your head.

It's just essentially what you do anyway. He just stares at me and he's like, oh, she's off again. We will be back for part two very soon.

Thank you for having my boyfriend. He's very nice, even though I didn't learn to speak. And thank you for having me because, you know, I crave attention and you 12 people are keeping me mentally stable.

Okay. Goodbye.