[short story] Needy omega needs his step mother’s breast milk to survive.

Transcript

We are alone, so completely alone that every fiber in my being is wildly aware of her presence, of every move she makes. We remain standing, saying nothing, barely even looking at each other. I feel Laura about to say something, but I don't give her the chance.

I turn away and start hurriedly back to the house, my knee aching from the amount of pressure I'm putting on it to move faster. I wobble, taking a nasty stumble, and Laura is beside me in no time, catching me by the arm. Her touch sends liquid fire through my veins.

Let me help, she says. I'm fine. I snap my arm away from her and sprint back into the house, hurrying straight to my room and slamming my door shut.

I hurry to my bed and bury my face in it, my body already shivering from enduring her pheromones all day. It's almost unbearable. My head is spinning, and my mouth is dry, so dry it feels almost scorching.

Groaning, I squeeze the pillow and force my face into it, taming the grunts escaping me. It hurts. It hurts so fucking much.

My heat circle is still weeks away. There is no way that I'm. ..

I'm. .. I spring up from the bed.

Heavens no. I hadn't made any plans for my circle except for the single bottle of suppressants I carry everywhere with me, but those barely work for an omega like me who never consummated his marking. I need milk.

Pure alpha milk for the raw vitamins. I thought there'd be enough time to get some bottles in the city. I can't be here without them.

I can't be close to her without them. Panicking, I reach for my phone and instantly log on to the OmegaCare app to check for a possible delivery this far from the city. They are wickedly expensive, but it is not a risk I'm willing to take.

Heavens. I mutter as I swipe, horrified at the sold-out signs attached to almost all premium bottles of alpha milk, and the synthetic ones which I hate do not have any means of delivery this far away from town. This can't be happening.

Her soft, tapering footsteps inches towards my door, and every hair on my skin stands forcing me to grind down hard on my teeth, swallowing so hard I can barely breathe. I hope she is not going to. A gentle knock sounds through the door.

I inhale a sharp breath, my heart palpating, racing as if to jump out of my chest. I turn away from the door, moving to the far left of the bed to get away from her pheromones. I'm certain they would soon start permeating through the door, which would undoubtedly worsen my situation.

I'm trying my hardest to stay away, to control myself. It's too much. Way too much.

Nolan. Laura's voice is barely above a whisper, but it carries through the door. Can we talk for a bit? I remain silent, turning my back to the door, hoping she'll take the hint and leave me alone.

Instead, the doorknob turns slowly, and the door creaks open. The overwhelming scent of her pheromones fills the room, like a river flooding a cave and my muscles tremble. You've always been so stubborn, she says softly, taking more steps into the room.

And seconds later, I feel the weight shift on the mattress as she sits down beside me. I can't imagine what you're going through. I know you're hurting.

Can we talk? I exhale a shuddery breath, squeezing the pillow tighter against me. Please leave.

Maybe this is not a good time. But we should talk. I don't want you feeling uncomfortable in your own home.

It's your home, Laura. You're my son. It's our home, and I.

.. Get out, my words slice into hers. Nolan.

I said get out. Now. It is a few more minutes before the bed creaks, and she is on her feet.

My heart folds and twists in guilt and agony, because never in a million years did I ever think I'd talk to her in such an appalling manner. There is no one I respect more in the world. I want her happy.

I want her to feel loved and treasured no matter what. Not this. Heaven knows not this.

But she can't be here. Not now. I squeeze the sheets as she nears the door, holding myself from turning around, running to her, throwing my arms around her neck, weeping apologies and begging her to forgive me for not just this, but that night too.

But I know in the end, those are not the words resting on my lips. Those are not the words I want to scream at the top of my lungs. Even if I do run to her.

Even if I do apologize. There is no guarantee I won't spew and confess the forbidden words I can never say. I love you, and not like a son.

Not in the same way you love me. And it's killing me. I can't take it anymore.

Make it stop. Let me know if you need anything, sweetheart, she says. And soon after, the door shuts.

I dash out of bed and hurry to my closest. Retrieving my suppressants, I toss three pills into my mouth and gulp them down. My body is still shaking as I slump onto the sofa and bury my face in my palm, ashamed and disgusted with myself.

For a moment, I rub my eyes, then pull my hair, counting the seconds, until the suppressants begin to do what little they can. Sitting is driving me insane, so instead, I rise from the sofa and begin to pace the room in a bid to quiet the roaring voices in my head. With every second, the need to go after her worsens, and though I'm starting to feel some relief, everything still aches.

Especially my chest. The anxiety wreaking havoc on my body. It feels like hours since she left the room, yet the eye is still eating me from the inside out, tearing at my flesh, making me feel smaller and smaller, too little to contain myself.

I check the time on my phone. Almost midnight. It's late enough.

She must have fallen asleep by now, and I need to dunk my entire body in an ice bath to help with the heat. With a deep breath, I make my way out of the room, and start down the hall, toward the kitchen to check for some ice. But my legs stop when I arrive by the stairs.

That selfish need to speak to her returns, and I pin my gaze up the stairs, fighting to keep moving. Her room is upstairs. With my leg, it will be difficult to make the trip.

But I am determined. I can do this. I should do this.

But again, it's past midnight. Waking her up will do us no good. It's not as if I'm capable of withstanding her pheromones if I'm close.

I hate that she went to bed angry at me, above all else. I hate to think that I have disappointed her again. Just when I'm about to make the first step up the stairs, I hear a drawer close in the kitchen and turn to it.

The sound invites me to the kitchen, and I follow it, limping slowly until I am standing by the kitchen door. Laura is wiping down the counter. Her hair, touched with grey-silver streaks, lay lazily against her back, and she has changed into her free-flowing nightdress.

I remain by the kitchen door, watching her move from one end to another until she turns and catches sight of me. With a little gasp, she grabs her chest. Dear Lord Nolan.

She chuckles. You gave me a scare. I'm sorry.

Didn't mean to. It's everything okay? I nod, my eyes doing a quick run over her.

She has remained beautiful over the years, like a rose, carefully preserved in winter. Her body, even more rich with age. It is not intentional when my eyes are on her.

It is not intentional when my eyes graze over her braless breasts, a habit it seems I have retained from my teenage years. I look away the second I catch myself and continue in. It's quite late, Laura.

Just cleaning up before turning in for the night. Did you need something? Should have helped you clean up, I say, arriving by the island.

She smiles. It's no bother. Besides, you're terrible at cleaning.

I chuckle. I'm not a kid anymore, Loran. I do a decent job.

Hmm. I guess I will always remember you as the little boy who'd rather hide his dirty boxers in the mattress for days than admit he didn't know how to use the washing machine. I cringe, stifling a groan from both embarrassment and shame.

I was trying to impress her even then. I looked stupid. It sucks that this is how she will always remember me.

As a stupid, geeky teenage boy, stacking dirty underwear under his mattress. No need to be embarrassed, Laura says, reading me easily. We've all done cringey teenage things.

Yeah. What are some of yours? She hums, crossing her arms.

Feels like generations ago, but at the same time like it was just yesterday. But I used to be something of a tomboy back in the day. My brows shoot up.

No way. Hmm. It was all an act.

I wanted to be cool because no one liked nerds. And I needed friends. My mother threw a fit about it for months.

We both chuckle. It was not really who I was. And she could see that.

For the record, if I knew you back then, I would have thought you were cool. She laughs softly. You have to say that.

I'm your mother. The kitchen is quiet for a time before I lean back, digging my hands into my pocket. Why do you always have to say that? Say what? Remind me that you raised me.

Her shoulders lightly shrug. Didn't know it was a problem. Well, I.

.. I. ..

I trail my gaze away. I came here to apologize about earlier. I should never have spoken to you like that.

I'm incredibly sorry, Laura. You deserve better than that, way better. Thank you, Nolan.

She nods. Her gaze still warm. Another bout of silence sits with us for a few minutes, before I rest my elbows over the counter.

I'm grateful for the years you spent taking care of me. You married into a responsibility that should have never been yours. So please, Laura, don't take this the wrong way.

When I say, you're not my mother, and I'd love it if you start seeing me as something else. Ouch. Her brows furrow tightly, and then after a few seconds, her face relaxes.

And what would you rather I see you as? A friend, I say, immediately and bite down hard on my lips. She sighs, shaking her head.

I see. You do? War has made you a different man.

In many ways, I agree. I know there is a long ahead to finding my old self. Or maybe embracing the new you.

I shake my head. How can I embrace someone I hardly know? Laura exhales, her fingers tapping lightly against the counter.

You should have never enlisted. I had to. She insists.

I had to, Laura. I begged you. Begged you to stay.

I couldn't. Why not? I would have gone mad, living in the same house with my father's wife, knowing that every second of every day I belonged to you.

My body, heart, and soul, claimed by you. And I couldn't give myself the way I yearned to give myself. Stop.

I turn my head, exposing her mark on me, and Laura inhales a sharp breath. It's still there. It's never going anywhere.

Believe me, I have tried everything to unmark myself, to correct my mistake. If I could free myself from our bond, I. ..

She turns away from me, giving me her back for a time before spinning back around. Do you know what it was like, watching the news, scared out of my mind that you will not make it out alive? I was called.

I know. And you never thought to write back? I couldn't.

Wouldn't, she corrects, and the tension thickens between us. If you read my letters, you would have known the truth of what I felt. You didn't deserve that.

You deserved a better son, a real family, the kind you wrote about in your journals. I wanted you to have that. Everyone has crushes when they're a kid, Nolan.

They don't sign up to have bombs dropped over their heads to get away from it. You outgrow it and move on and everything goes back to normal without. ..

I haven't. What? I haven't gotten over it.

I haven't gotten over you. I did not outgrow it. As I sit here, right now, in this very moment, every muscle under my skin is at war with itself.

Because all I have thought about since the moment I laid my eyes on you was kissing you. Nolan. At least to know for once what that feels like.

I carry a picture of you in my wallet. And every night as I flew across cities, dropping bombs, killing hundreds of people, I thought only of your face. It is what kept me alive.

What made me fight my way out of that plane. I could only think I don't want to die without knowing what it would feel like to. ..

I stop myself and exhale. Through every abominable word, Laura has been staring at me eyes wide, thrown off by my brazen confession, and fear ceases my heart. Because I don't know what her next words would be.

What she's thinking. Why she's looking at me with utter disbelief. Like I'm a complete stranger, someone foreign, distant.

I wish I could reach into her mind and see what she's thinking. I did not mean to startle you with that. I rise from the chair, throwing my gaze anywhere else but her face.

I'll head back to bed. I will go. A wave of tingles washes over me and I groan, doubling over.

I have been sitting in her pheromones for far too long. My body is immensely weakened by it. The simple act of standing is causing my head to spin.

Are you okay? Laura leans forward, her eyes closely examining me. Yeah, I clear my throat and try to force my legs forward.

I need to get away from her. I need to be far away from this kitchen, her scent, this unbearable conversation. But with another step forward, my legs wobble.

Laura rushes over and catches me in time, her arms wrapping around me, her chest pressed against mine, and I force myself into stillness. She places a palm over my head, the way she used to when I got sick as a boy, her gaze motherly and warm with concern. No one ever looks at me this way.

No one's eyes have ever worried about me this way. My heart could combust with joy from being held this way, and against my better judgment. I hook an arm around her waist and rest my head on her shoulder.

Oh, Laura. I exhale, basking in her loving pheromones. I have craved nothing more than this for years, to be held and cradled in her arms, to bask in her care and the warmth of her pheromones, so up close it almost feels like I'm falling into delirium.

I'm sickened at the thought of breaking away, of not being in her arms, of not drowning in the waves of her pheromones. I grab her nightdress by the side, and gently pull her in, her scent intoxicating me as I bury my nose in the crook of her neck. I want to lick her, taste her, bury myself inside her.

Maybe it's the pheromones, maybe it's the unquenchable desire I have held back for years, but all of it is crashing in at once and I can't hold back. I don't want to. You're in heat? She asks warmly, and I squeeze her tighter.

For how long now? Yesterday. I think.

Damn it, Nolan! I didn't know that was what was happening. She sighs, her fingers petting my hair.

Heavens, her body is so warm, so tender, so welcoming. Your suppressants? I shake my head.

Milk. Laura stiffens against mine. What? I don't want to talk.

I want to remain like this for as long as I can steal. I need you, Loran. I need you.

You're burning up, she says, her hands sliding down my face until they're cupping my cheek, and I close my eyes, internally cursing when she begins leaning away. Where are your suppressants? An exasperated sigh leaves me.

They won't work on me, Laura. My gaze falls to her breast, full and plump under the light cotton fabric of her nightdress, and this time I don't bother looking away. Everything is all warped in my head.

I'm starting to lose my sense of control and reason. Why? Why not? Laura asks, and I find her eyes.

You never. .. We never.

.. I exhale and lean back against the island. Omegas need certain things after a marking, Laura.

I know you've never been with one, but. .. Well.

.. Suppressants won't work unless the alpha that marked me. ..

I bite my lips, killing the words I'm about to spew. Oh. She blinks, knowingly swallowing.

Don't worry. I manage on store-bought milk. Just didn't think I would need it this soon.

The raw vitamins help my suppressants work better. Has it been this way all these years? I nod.

I'll manage till tomorrow morning. But I should probably put some distance between you and me. Your pheromones are suffocating.

Her fingers adjust the hair lying lazily on my forehead. Are you sure you can manage until tomorrow morning? Yes, Mo.

I stop myself before the word slips past my lips, my eyes flying open. I haven't called her that in years, not since before I realized I saw her as more than a parent. But something about being this way with her is making me feel small again.

Like a little boy in need of coddling. I clear my throat and take a step back, squaring my shoulders to remind myself that I am a man. An airman.

I'll be fine. I gently move her hand away. Lie down in the living room.

I'll be right back. She hurries out of the kitchen and up the stairs. And though I'm compelled to run into my room and pretend I didn't just spew my guts in front of Loran, I obey and limp to the sitting room.

I fall onto the sofa, my body shaking as I grab my head. It's starting to ache now, so badly that it feels as though my head is splitting into a thousand pieces. I already popped three suppressants, but the urge to pop another three surfaces.

Laura comes running down the stairs. I brought a cool towel. Thank you.

I stretch my hands to reach for it, and she shakes her head. Let me. Thanks for the offer, Loran.

But, you know, if you want to help, you're going to have to give me space. Nolan, I'm not going anywhere. Stay still.

Your pheromones are overwhelming. It's making it worse. Our gazes lock for a time.

I should go back to my room. There are. ..

My words are cut off when my gaze lands on the little wet spot spreading through her nightdress and my breath hitches. In the few minutes since Laura disappeared into the house and returned, there has been a significant swell to her breasts, the kind that tells me that perhaps my pheromones have been affecting her with the same intensity hers affects me. Loran's eyes follow my gaze, and she cups her breasts when she realizes she's leaking, gasping a shallow breath.

Heavens, she curses, and then a little chuckle. That explains why my body has been going crazy all day. She turns away from me.

I'm. .. I'm not quite used to being around omegas.

It's been years, not since you. The air is silent for a time before I rise. Good night, Laura.

I move to limp past her but only stumble, swaying before Loran has me back in her arms. She settles me back into the sofa and sits beside me, placing the towel back on my forehead. You're too sick to move.

Why didn't you say something earlier? I would have made you a nest, at least. I swallow, biting my lower lip as my eyes find her breast again.

It's a difficult affair to try and stop my gaze from lingering, and when I do, my mind spirals. It feels like I'm drunk. Everything is starting to blur as I go.

You never asked for this, Laura. I put this on you. How could I ask for any more? I was the adult in the room, Nolan.

That night isn't only on you. I was eighteen. You were a kid.

I could have done better, fought harder to ward off your pheromones. It was my responsibility. I swallow, adjusting until I am completely facing her.

Are you saying you let it happen? Laura blinks, and I close my eyes. You let it happen.

Laura blinks. I was. ..

It was a short-sighted decision. My brows furrow. You wanted to.

.. mark me. I would have bitten into anything that night, Nolan.

Her words dismiss the assumptions cooking up in my head, and I bite into my inner cheek, something bitter stirring inside me. The wet spot around her breast spreads. She is leaking a bit more now, as I get dressed.

And my mouth waters. My cock twitches. Most omegas are breastfed the same day they are marked.

Aside from not knowing what it's like to be nodded, I haven't the slightest clue what it feels like to have my lips around the nipples of an alpha, suckling until orgasm. It has always felt as though a part of me has been missing, a part I could not find in anyone else's arms, and I desire so terribly to know what it feels to experience this through the natural means, instead of a bottle. I shouldn't ask this of her, but heavens, I'm not thinking straight.

And maybe I don't want to. I have given the last of my strength to withstanding the overwhelming pressure her pheromones are putting on my muscles. But what if I let myself go? What if I stop holding myself back? You're lying, I accuse.

About what, she asks. You're reacting to my pheromones. If it means nothing, why then are you reacting? I marked you, it's a normal reaction.

No, there is more. Nolan, let's not do this. Anything? I mutter.

You would have bitten into anyone? I'll get you to bed. She moves to lift me off the sofa and I stop her hands.

Why not me? Heaven's sake. She sighs.

It wouldn't matter anyway. Right? You will never see me as an Omega, so why not me? I know you can't think straight right now, but I'm still your mother, Nolan.

I raised you. We can never be. Stepmother.

And now I'm man enough to make you a mother if that is what you need. Nolan, is it? Is it? Is that what you need? You always wanted a family.

Your own family. You're not in your right mind. I'm in heat.

Not stupid, Laura. I pout, swallowing. Am I no longer your baby boy? Her gaze softens at me.

You will always be my little boy. I whimper at the mention of that pet name on her tongue. The one she stopped calling me as soon as I stopped calling her mommy.

Warm chills travels through me and soon I find myself squeezing the helm of her dress and before I can even think, the word slips past my lips. Mommy, I mutter, aching in every muscle, in every bone. Nolan.

Milk. I tug at her dress. Just this once.

Heaven's fuck what's wrong with me. Pull yourself together, Nolan. Pull yourself fucking together.

I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. You're right.

We should stop. I try sitting up, but she places a hand on my chest and guides me back onto the sofa. It will start hurting in a bit, she says.

My breasts, I mean. Oh, I stutter. I don't fill up with milk often.

Maybe it's best if you if you suckle from me. I shake my head. You don't have to.

She slides one hand of her nightdress down, revealing a right breast, swollen and full, with tiny drops of milk leaking from her nipple and I swallow. Loran is beautiful. Her skin is so perfectly polished and alluring.

All the breath in my lungs is immediately sucked away and with it, every thought, my mind goes blank and all I can do is allow my eyes absorb her astounding beauty. Even the heat burning under my flesh doesn't stop me from gaping at her in wonder of her fine womanly curve and I'm not sure I can drag myself out of the trance I'm buried under. I marked you, she says, sitting next to me.

You shouldn't have to suffer because of it. Seven years is a long time, Nolan. You should have told me.

My heart caves. Would it have changed anything? Would you have wanted me? Would you have made me yours? You've always been mine and there are other ways to get you what you need.

I could have pumped for you, sweetheart. Her fingers feathers across my cheek and I know better than to let my heart be deceived by those words. She doesn't mean it the way I hear it.

I have always been hers but only like a son. I bite my lip and I turn away. I can make it through the night without your milk, Laura.

Yes, I need her but I cannot picture a world where suckling from her once will be enough. The need to be attached to her again and again will triumph over everything else in my life until I'm back where I was when I first joined the Air Force, miserable, and defeated. Maybe, she taps her lap, but you will be stronger if you nurse from me instead.

I open my mouth to protest because I know I will not be able to stop myself. I will reach for more and more until there is nothing else to reach for. You'll also be helping me out if you suckle.

She presses on, cutting into my thoughts. With time, I am comforted with no relief. Milk drips from her nipple, sending a shiver through me as my mouth waters.

Gently, she lowers me onto her lap, positioning me carefully until I'm right under her breast, her nipples right in place to suckle. A little drop of milk hits against my lips and whatever is left of my resistance slips away. I turn my head inward as her hands cradle me closer and my dick throbs, I need you to suckle for me, sweetheart.

She croons. I curl my toes and squeeze the side of my clothes and attempt to stop myself from hardening any further. She has been kind enough to extend herself this way and I don't want to give her the slightest impression that any of this will cross the line.

This is simply an alpha helping an omega in need and nothing more. I need to stay soft. I need to stay soft.

I need to stay soft. It's alright, sweetheart. Those are normal, Laura says, gently grazing my dick with her fingers.

You don't have to hide it from me. Just suckle. I'm not sure how she could tell what lingered in my thoughts but it feels like a weight taken off my shoulders because yes, getting hard is normal for omegas it doesn't have to mean something more.

My lips graze her nipple again and this time I latch on to her firm round nipple and without giving much thought to it achieve my first suckle. A warm stream of creamy sweetness fills my mouth and I moan, squeezing my eyes shut as my entire body comes undone. I have only ever known what milk tastes like when it is coming from a bottle.

Store-bought microwavable alpha milk has been a means of survival for years and now I'm realizing that real alpha milk tastes nothing like store-bought milk even the way it sits on the tongue is different. There is a smooth thickness to it creamy and warm as it slides down my throat filling my tummy banishing the waves of heat in my veins. Gently, I cradle Laura's left breast as I suckle from her right giving it a gentle squeeze as the most melodious moan I have ever heard pours out from her making me shiver.

I can feel the slight tremble in her thigh the heat spreading from between her legs and when I open my eyes to get just a little glimpse at her face my dick hardens. Laura's head is slightly thrown backward as she bites her lips and the way her face twists with passion elicits all sorts of desires from my core. It's difficult to think her breasts are full and engorged with milk making it easy to suckle and squeeze.

They are comforting squishy and so lustful. I keep my lips tender around her nipple something naive and coy about the way I'm sucking even to my ears. The sounds of my suckling are so fulfilling and in no time my briefs are soaked with wetness the knot loosening at the tip of my dick as the world around me spins.

I am enamored by just how relaxed my body gets with each suck as though I'm wrapped in a blanket of warm clouds and felt to float under the warmth of the sun. It's dizzying and immensely satisfying. I try to keep my eyes shut focus on her breasts and only her breasts but several times I fail dragging my gaze back to her incredibly elegant features.

Her brows are slightly furrowed but everything else is relaxed and calm. Her soft moans are impossible to bear they are dragging further deep making me harder as I curl my toes in a bid to fight my need to reach over slowly unzip my trousers and let my dick out. I press my knees together and fight the urge.

I can't allow myself to reach for more than she is capable of giving me. When she offered to breastfeed me I didn't think things would get this intense very quickly. I had thought it would be possible to suckle without savage sexual desires just the same way there was no urge to sexual release when I drank from a bottle.

But this is different way intense and overwhelming. Without thinking I reach for the left hand of her nightdress and pull it down. My hand has been fondling it through her dress for a while now and now I'm aching for a little more.

I want to suckle from both her breasts squeezing gently as I take turns on them. They are both so full and soft. Maybe I'm a little greedy maybe I'm crossing a line I will not be able to come back from but I need more.

My entire body screams for it calls for it without missing a beat. My lips leave her right breast for her left. My body turning and adjusting until I'm comfortable enough to suck her left breast while fondling her right.

With every second my patience weakens and I fight to continue keeping my sucks gentle but they are faster now seeking to claim every last drop of milk from her breasts and the need worsens the situation between my legs making me so stiff a slight pain grips my tip. A loud muffled voice a loud muffled moan rips through me as I wriggle against her body the milk dripping carelessly from my mouth each time I try to take a break and for a moment it feels like I'm slipping into madness like I'm losing my fucking mind. Letting go of her right breast I palm my dick through the fabric of my trousers and fill my mouth with milk.

The pain of keeping my dick contained is overwhelming and squeezing it hard will help me control the pain because I don't want to stop sucking. Heavens I never want to stop not now not when she runs out of milk. Nolan she whispers through a moan Mommy saying the word while nursing from her is overwhelmingly good and for a second I contemplate crossing that line digging my hand into my trousers and stroking myself until I'm fully relieved of the ache.

The thought is swept away from my mind when Laura's gentle hand begins to pull me away from her nipple from her bosom. I leave my eyes closed reluctant to open them as I savor the taste of her milk still on my tongue. It all feels like a dream an experience that is too good to be true and I don't want to open my eyes and ruin it.

I want to hang on to this moment for as long as I possibly can. It's ending too soon. Laura rises from the sofa and begins fixing her dress taking a few steps away from me and though it's all woozy in my head I fight to pin my focus on her.

I want to see what thoughts lace her mind. A little guilt swirls in my gut. Loran I call, sitting up.

We should call it a night. You must be exhausted. You need to get some sleep.

This is the best I have felt in a very long time. I'm glad you feel better, Nolan. We should stop here.

I nod. Okay. My heart palpates even though my body is finally calm enough to relax.

I'm so sorry, Loran. I'm so, so, so sorry. Don't do that, she says, keeping her eyes on the wall.

Tell me what you want me to do. Nothing, Nolan. I leave my eyes on her for a few seconds not sure what to do with myself except feel like a complete idiot for being pushy and over-demanding.

This is not how I thought things would go. I wanted to do better with her after forcing us to drift apart over the years. I rise from the sofa and start toward the stairs before my legs stop.

Turning around I find Laura's eyes almost immediately. Has it always been only me? What? Does a world exist where you have ever looked at me as someone that could be more to you? Because I could be.

Laura, I don't know how to look past what we are. My brows shoot up. Does that mean you want to? Have you ever considered it? You're like a son to me, Nolan.

Yes. I take a step forward. You say that all the time.

Are you trying to remind me or yourself? Nolan, I felt you like never before. Your needs.

Your desires. Those were not the feelings of someone who detests what I feel for you. Don't.

Why not? My hands reach for her and she turns away. Loran, please.

I don't want to ruin you, Nolan. You should be with someone your age. Someone who can understand the world the way you do.

Someone you can explore and learn with. Someone who can. ..

I don't want to be with someone who understands the world the way I do. I want to be with you. I want to see the world through your eyes and learn the things that matter to you.

She shakes her head. It's not fair to you. It's not right.

A few steps forward. And I'm close enough to bring my forehead to hers, her warm breath brushing against my lips as she exhales. I can still smell her pheromones, still feel her warmth, and once again I'm aching to be in her arms, to intertwine our bodies and let her touch soothe me.

Everything in me aches and twists with the need until my fingers are wrapping around hers. For today, then, I whisper, let's pretend I'm someone else. Let's pretend you weren't the woman who raised me.

I can go back to being your son tomorrow. Her gaze meets mine and I melt. Tonight, let me be anyone else.

Someone else? She mutters after inhaling a sharp breath and I nod. Someone else.

Something snaps between us. Laura throws her arms around my shoulder and in a blink of an eye, she pins me to the wall. Our bodies colliding in a heat wave as her lips meet mine.

Heavens. I'm kissing Lorraine. There is a moment when I don't realize that is what's happening and when my brain finally connects the dots.