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We have coffee every Saturday morning, and have done so for the last year. Our friendship was unexpected, given I'm a bit older than you, but we clicked right away and haven't looked back since. Today you're not quite yourself when you show up at my place, but you don't want to talk about it. Eventually, though, you can't help yourself. You reveal that everyone you work with has been making fun of you for being a virgin thanks to the big mouth of a girl you rejected on your last date. You have your reasons for not having sex yet, and that's perfectly valid, which I tell you in no uncertain terms. If you're happy being a virgin, that's not their business. Then you throw me a curveball. You admit that you want me to be your first. You've thought about this a lot, and you've wanted this for awhile now. This is a huge privilege and since I care about you the way you care about me, I'm going to make sure your first time is as memorable as possible... Full Audio: https://ohcleo.com/post/clqybrp1y6758099liobp0e3eh6
Transcript
Wow. So, to your face, she was all understanding, but behind your back, she went to the guy you work with and told him everything. Well, he sounds like a peach that he decided to tell everybody that you work with.
Like, what the? What is wrong with people, honestly? Humanity is fucked.
Anyway, um, so now they're all making fun of you for being a virgin. Okay, I may be old here, but why the fuck is that a big deal? No, I'm not kidding.
I just don't see what the problem is with wanting to wait to take that step. With wanting to make sure it's actually right. I mean, sex isn't a throwaway thing as much as today's society seems to think that it is.
And it's absolutely okay to feel that way, but it's not. But it's worth waiting for. And you worked so hard through college.
You were so focused on finishing and getting through your program, getting the job that you wanted. Like, there's nothing wrong with having ambition and having goals and putting that kind of thing on the back burner. So, if you're okay with being a virgin because that was your choice, they can just go fuck themselves.
Well, no one else matters. I don't care who sees it that way. If you're happy being a virgin, then be a virgin.
Who cares? What's that look? Oh, you're not happy being a virgin.
Okay, well, yeah, I get it. You haven't dated anyone that you're willing to take that step with. I totally understand.
Wanting to get to know someone and care about them before you go there is absolutely reasonable and valid and commendable. There will be someone perfect for your first time. There's nothing wrong with being selective.
Come here. You look like you need a hug. Come here.
You know how awesome you are, right? Look at me. Look at me.
From the first day that you offered to carry my groceries up the stairs for me from the parking lot just after I moved in, I knew there was something special about you. That's why we spent three hours talking that afternoon and why we've had coffee every Saturday morning since. Whoever you choose as your first is going to be very, very lucky because that's a huge privilege.
Okay? Don't let those assholes at work get in your head. They don't deserve to live there rent-free.
Okay? No, they don't. I'm just telling you the truth.
I'm not doing anything but being honest. You're nice and warm. Feel better? Mm-hmm.
Okay. Hold on. What are you doing? Why are you leaving? Sit down.
Just sit down, please. You don't have to leave. It's okay.
You just caught me off guard a little bit. We've never done that before. You have.
You've wanted to. Oh, a lot. Okay.
Mm-hmm. Well, that's a little bit heavy. How did I make it easier for you to say no to that girl? Okay.
That's why you didn't want to talk about this with me. Do you want me to be your first? Wow.
Was not expecting that this morning. No, no. It's okay.
Are you sure that's what you want? Mm-hmm. Okay.
Well, I'm absolutely game. Mm-hmm.
-watering second of every track.