Rebound with the cereal thief

Transcript

Here I am, standing in the cereal aisle. Eyes fixed on the prize. Honey, not Cheerios.

Good! It's the only thing that gets me started in the morning. Crunchy burst of sweetness never fails to put a smile on my face.

And there it is, the last box. Practically calling my name. Just as I reach out to claim it, he appears.

Mr. Blue Hoodie, with his nonchalant stroll down the aisle, as if he's on some leisurely Sunday stroll. Except he's not just strolling.

He's eyeing up the last box, like they're the fucking crown jewels or something. Isn't that just a box? With that smugness on his face that I just can't.

.. The audacity! The nerve! He just waters in here and he thinks he can take what's rightfully mine without a second thought.

Who does he think he is? I can't, I can't, I can't start raging in the supermarket. I'm in public.

I know I'm having a terrible day. It's probably PMS. How dare he? Doesn't he realize the importance of breakfast? Doesn't he understand that a day without my honey, not Cheerios, is like a day without.

.. Well, honey, not Cheerios. Calm down.

Calm down. It's just cereal. There are other options.

I could get some. .. I don't know.

Nesquik? No. There's honey in the nut.

Maybe I should get some bagels. Yeah, bagels with fried egg and bacon. I don't want to fry bacon early in the morning.

It's not about the cereal, it's about the principle. Fairness. Common courtesy.

Whatever happened to chivalry? I could kill him. I could just kill him.

Just, just, just, just strangle him and take the cereal out of his basket. Okay. What else do we need? What else do we need? Milk.

Milk. What am I going to do with the milk? Sure, I'm going to put it in my coffee, but I can't have cereal.

Fuck this. I'm going home. This is just not my day.

I'll come back tomorrow. Maybe I'll check the other supermarket. They might have it.

It's only ten minutes walk away. Oh my god. Oh.

He's so oblivious. Why does he have to come to the checkout now? What is he smiling at me for? What is this fake politeness? Maybe I should say something.

Like cereal teeth. What did he buy? Maybe he's not that bad.

He has lots of healthy stuff and some snacks. God, he's just like me. Oh, he's going to talk to me? Jesus, don't talk to me.

Don't come near me. Hi. My keychain? Oh, yeah.

I completely forgot about this. A Honey Nut Cheerios keychain. I know it's silly, but it's my favourite cereal and yeah, you did get the last box.

It's your favourite too. Isn't that nice? I guess I'll survive these phone fakes for another week.

No, it's fine. You have it. Really? You want to buy me a coffee as a sorry? That's kind of sweet.

Maybe I'm kind of cute. Sure, why not? But just so you know, I take my coffee as seriously as I take my cereal.

Thanks again. You really didn't need to buy me a coffee, but I appreciate it. It's been actually nice getting to know you.

Sorry to hear about all that stuff with your girlfriend. I mean, ex-girlfriend. How are you holding up? So it's been what, a month since she broke up with you? Right.

I'm going to be very honest with you. Is that okay? Right, so I've also just been through a breakup and I'm not quite ready to jump into anything new yet, but I do find you really attractive and I've been very stressed lately and okay, I'm just going to say it.

Do you want to have sex? I know, I know it's very forward, but I just want to release some stress, you know, and you're kind of cute and funny and hey, we could go to yours. And if I happen to sleep over, at least I have cereal in the morning.

Right. Okay. Let's do this.

Have I done this before? No, of course not. I'm not.

All right, come closer. All right, let's go to yours. Mr.

Blue Hoodie, you're quite a good kisser. Oh yeah. Let me kiss your neck.

It's not so nice, you know. Take this off. Oh God, I love the way you suck on my nipples.

Pinch them a little bit. God, pussy's so wet for you already. Oh, yes.

Rub your finger on my clit. Oh, that's so fucking nice. Oh my gosh.

Yes, that's fucking nice. Oh, yes, yes, yes, just like that. Yes.

Oh, fuck. Yeah, and I push your finger in. Yeah, I push your finger in.

Oh, fuck. Oh, yes. Oh, yes, baby.

Two fingers, please, two fingers. Oh, yes. Oh, yes.

Oh, fuck. I want to suck your leg, please, please, yeah. Take your jeans off.

Sit down here. Yeah. Get on my knees.

Sit. Sit. This is a nice day, a really nice day.

Just play with the tip a little bit since you're so hot for me. Very good. I'll do that.

Has anyone ever told you how delicious your dick is? Yes. Do you like your balls sucked off? Yeah? Want me to do that? Okay.

That's it. That's me. I like that.

I like that a lot. That's it. Yeah.

My squeezy balls will have to suck you. Oh, my God. Oh, my God.

Freak, that is so delicious. Oh, yeah. That is so nice.

Call me pretty while I'm down here. Your dick shot into my mouth. I like that.

Call me pretty. Call me beautiful. Push it, diva.

Wow. Let me just lay on my back here. I want you inside me, please.

Yeah, I want that beautiful dick inside me. Yeah, come and kiss me. Push it out.

Oh, yeah. Feels nice. Oh, my pussy's been so wet.

Fuck me now. Fuck me. Yeah, we feel good.

You feel good. Really fucking nice. Oh, yes.

Hold my hand here. Oh, yes. Squeeze my hand like that.

Oh, God. Oh, yes. Oh, God.

It's been a while. It's been a while. You know, towards the end, my ex will never fuck me.

It's been so fucking long, and this. I really fucking needed this. Really fucking needed this.

Oh, yes. You go a little bit faster. Yeah, you go a little bit faster.

Oh, good. Oh, yes. Oh, yes, yes, yes.

Oh, fuck. Oh, yeah. Oh, fuck yes.

Oh, fuck yes. Kiss me, please. Put my, put my legs up here on your neck so you can get in there even deeper.