❤️ 😘 Praise of the MILF 😘 ❤️ (F4A) (THICC American MILF Praises You) (Sitting on You & Covering You in Kisses)

Transcript

Honey? I have a very important question. Am I too old to wear shorts? What? It is the most important, serious, ultimate question ever.

Don't you laugh at me. Because I'm not a spry young chicken anymore and I want people to be like, oh my god, put it away. But then my practical, emotionally intelligent side says, screw societal standards and stand on your own two feet.

But then I'm an insecure little bug. So what do you think? As serious as HIV, please? And you're not just saying that to shut me up? Promise? Then these thunder thighs will rise again and the shorties are short shorts.

I'm going to sit on you now. You're awfully quiet. What's going on? Are you insane in the membrane again? Oh, I don't know.

Plagued by anxiety, depression, a sense of, oh no, the planet's on fire. I know, it's almost like I know you. My little munch.

What's the matter? Are you cringing because of the shorts conversation? Then what is with the glum? Ah, the glum in your eyes, on your face, drooping down and on your mouth.

I see you. Because I'm a responsible old lady and I wear my glasses. I see you.

You are sad. Why is this little babush sad? Hmm.

Is it something I've done? No. Is it another person? An external force? Oh, baby.

You just don't tuck her down. I have the cure for what ails you. You.

Come, Heather. Hat on the teddy. I have got thee.

My strong soldier. Of course you're a soldier. You have a job.

Work is a battlefield. Capitalism is a curse. But we love our little treats, so let's keep going.

I'm sorry. That we have to have jobs and they steal our life force. Would it help if I told you you are very pretty? I would never fab or lie.

You are very, very pretty. You smell good. And you have the softest hair and the kindest eyes.

And for that reason, you will have to stay with this old lady. I hope you understand and take it well. You make me want to squeeze you.

Like a little stress ball. Because you are the squishiest, cutest, most wonderful smelling little squish ever. And I'm so sorry about life and its constant demands and expectations.

But you, listen to me, look at me in the face. You are doing a really good job. You are doing a really good job.

You are not listening. I love you, but I also see you. There's no rose-tinted glasses here.

I know your flaws, and I am telling you, you are doing a really good job. A really good job. I'm happy you needed to hear that.

Because you're always so, no, I'm fine, I'm just going to the gym, oh no, I'm gonna go see my mom. When are you making time for you? It's okay.

No, it is very important to make time for you. Because you are important. Why can you not? Why? You are not a stupid person.

No, you are a very smart person. Which is why it's so baffling that you constantly cannot see how wonderful you are. You shush and cease and desist.

You are wonderful. Because I would not be with someone who wasn't. Your self-criticisms don't just affect you, you know.

I have wonderful, exquisite, excellent taste, hence why I chose you. So no more disparaging my taste. Tell me I have good taste.

Do it, do it, do it. I'm going to bite you. Because you deserve to be bitten.

Well, one, you're scrumdiddlyumptious, and two, you need a sharp shock. And be nice to yourself and recognize your hard work. Because I will do nothing because I don't believe in acts of violence, but I will be disappointed if you don't.

Oh, shut up and accept yourself. Because you're great, and you're lovely, and you're smart, and you're kind, and you are very aesthetically pleasing. Oh, you did and do a good job.

You do a good job, baby. Learn to accept it. Oh, that's it, death by, oh, death by a thick lady sitting on you and squishing you with her boobies.

I know what's the worst kind of punishment, suffer. Smother and suffocate, it's what you deserve. Are you going to be nicer to yourself? Oh, well, then you must stay there.

No, I'm sorry, I know it's a fate worse than death, but you'll just have to, you'll just have to manage. You will have good self-esteem, damn you. Oh, one way or another.

You can think of a way? Positive reinforcement, huh? And what would I be reinforcing it with? Hmm, so just so we're clear, you're proposing I motivate you with sex? And you'll say nice things about yourself? Well, if that's what it takes.