No Touch Diaries: Day 21-25

Transcript

Okay, wow. It is almost done. Day 25.

Well, really, it's just after midnight, so day 26 of the No Touch Challenge. I've really had so much fun recording these diaries. I think the main thing on my mind today is planning what in the world I'm going to do once it's over.

I know to some it may seem a little strange or even excessive, dramatic, who knows, to document this challenge that I imposed on myself. But, you know, I like to romanticize my life. I like to document my time.

And this little creative outlet has been so rewarding. I'm starting to feel myself stir again. Starting to feel that desire build again.

And I have a feeling that the next few days are going to be particularly challenging. But what am I going to do when it's over? After so long, what will desire feel like? After ignoring it for weeks and weeks? When I did just seven days off of touching, when it was over, there were a couple days where I genuinely forgot that I could.

And it felt like I had to work up to that switch being easily flipped again. I have no idea if that'll be the case again here. Possibly.

I'm also like stone cold sober tonight. I like to usually have an edible or melatonin or smoke a little before bed. But I have an early day tomorrow and I want it to be sharp.

It's heightening a couple of senses. Right now, I'm in bed. And I'm just laying down.

Oh dear. I keep running my right hand up and down my thigh. Up, over my knee, and down to the inner thigh.

Up again, down again. It's a very soothing motion. But I'm feeling a very definite tingle when it hits my inner thigh.

Yeah, these next few days are going to be hard. I'm hoping that they won't be too difficult though because I knew that I could do this. I knew I could.

And honestly, if I had to, I'd go longer. But I don't want to. I really don't.

I want to round out the month and then celebrate October in whatever way I see fit. It's my favorite month of the entire year. It always has been.

And it definitely feeds into my flair for the dramatic. If you're listening to this, I wonder if you could tell me what you think I should do to celebrate my triumph. When I had my seven day challenge, I recorded my first session after it was over.

Honestly, I don't know. I don't know if I'll want to do that. Because the truth is, I'm not really sure if I'll be able to wait that long.

I feel like as soon as it hits midnight on October 1st, because I'm actually going to be quite busy on the evening of the 1st and the 2nd, so I'd be really annoyed if I had to not for another few days after waiting so long. This is a true ramble, isn't it? But I keep remembering that script I wrote.

It's called The Needs We Share. I'm looking it up. Forgive me, I'm sleepy.

Let me go to my script bin, see what's going on there. Yes, this is a really interesting exploration of need and desire. I think it could be a really nice one to do.

The thing is, is I don't really want to think about making wet sounds or sound effects or whether or not the mic is picking up something. I kind of just want to enjoy myself. Truly enjoy myself.

So, who knows? Who knows indeed? What I wonder is just how it will feel.

Who knows? I've never done this before, but I am deeply interested in finding out. This might be a short one.

I'm fading fast, but never fear. This next one, on the 30th, oh, that's gonna be much longer and more structured. Oh, that's gonna be much longer and more structured.

We're going to be summarizing the month again, reviewing highlights from our other diary entries, and with a little luck, maybe I'll have some other things to share as well. But, if you're listening and you've listened to the whole thing, thank you for being here and we're in the real homestretch now. Last week, I would have said that the challenge was over completely, but no.

I decided to go with my friends and do the entire month. And so, on the last day of September, we can celebrate together. But until then, I hope you have a great night.

Talk to you soon. Bye.