Lucifer - Outside the bar

Transcript

Yes, well, if you want to believe me, then you can. You can also decide not to believe me, but I promise you, once you see this, you will. Okay? Look at my eyes.

Keep looking at them. Don't freak out. Relax.

It's quite alright. Now listen. Okay? Listen very, very intently.

I am the one you call Satan. I am Lucifer. I am what you fear in the Christian, in your Christianity, in all of those things.

That is me. No matter what you might think, I am here and I have decided to talk to you. I have decided to show my true self to you.

Now what you would like to do with that information is all up to you. And I will tell you this, maybe my voice changes because I want you to listen to me in my true voice, even though I can't use my actual voice because, well, let's just say if I actually spoke with my true voice, this whole state would be up in flames. But now, if I actually let it go closer to where my voice truly lies, now you actually have a change.

Now you can hear me for what I truly am. So now you believe, don't you? Now you truly think, now you actually listen.

Right now I wouldn't mind answering any questions that you might have. You see, hell actually gets very boring when you've been around since the very beginning. And by hell I mean this world.

No, that is the first misconception that you humans have. Hell is not beneath you. You are living in it.

Why do you think so many bad things happen? Because this is hell. See though, what really happens when you die is you either go to heaven, right, or you don't go anywhere.

You just die. You die and you are forgotten. You don't get to continue on living.

So when you die, you're just changing from one place to another. You're still living. But if you die and you're not worthy of going to heaven, then you just truly die.

You become a memory and nothing else. You cease to exist. That is truly all that happens.

Now I can see that you're visibly ill. Take a moment. It's okay.

I have all the time in the world. No, don't throw up there though. These are new boots.

And even though I could just, well, clean them up in a second, I just don't want to have to go through that now, do I? There you are. Here.

Drink this. You'll feel much better, I promise. Yes, you're right.

I could just make you feel better, but I don't want to. I'd prefer to give you this and then at least you have to do some work. Or your body does, to feel better.

Now go ahead. What other questions do you have? Yes, I am the son of God.

Yes, I was his favorite. Well, let me explain, okay? And I will explain it and I will not lie to you because the truth is I don't like you.

He decided that you, humans, were going to be above us, above angels. For whatever reason that he had, he told us that we have to abide by this. And I did not understand.

You humans are, well, not us. You are savages. You actually sin.

You go against his will. You do not obey. Now, I don't like you because you took me away from my father, but you also showed me how much of a control freak he is.

And well, for that I have to thank you. See, I don't like you and I don't like him anymore. I don't like anyone.

Do you know why suicide is considered the worst thing in the church? Why if you kill yourself, you automatically are never allowed into the kingdom, into his kingdom. It's because I have tried to do it.

I am the only angel that has tried to not exist by my own hand. And God was so horrified by this that, well, he decided that no one would be able to do that without paying the highest consequence. He also made me immortal, truly immortal.

I can never die. Never. Now this is why I hate him and this is why I hate you.

Ah, memories. Well now, I must go. This has been a very, very great and refreshing conversation.

All I have to talk about every day are deals. Deals you mortals want to do all the time. But now I had something different to talk about, so for that I thank you.

Now, look at me. You won't remember anything that we just talked about. You won't remember anything at all.

Now go on and get home before someone rapes you. Because that's what this world has come to. You're all so pathetic.

Bye bye. May we never meet again.