✊ 🍑 JUSTICE FOR THE FAT ASS COMMUNITY 🍑 ✊ (F4A) (THICC GF) (Wholesome Rambling) (Cuddling & Gentle Kisses)

Transcript

Oh, what the fuck? I would be lost for words, but I honestly never shut the fuck up, so. ..

What a loser. What a scumbag. What a fumblewumblewumpwumpwump.

What an absolute loser. Oh, I'm so proud of you. No, you did not overreact.

I would have kicked him in the head and then told him to get the fuck out. You did so good. Honestly.

What a fucking loser. He had a chance to get his hands on the goods and he fumbled. What an absolute arse.

As a fellow member of the fat-ass community, I support you. A thousand percent. I am so proud of you, and I'm so pleased you have a backbone of self-worth.

Good for you. Call me later if you need me, okay? Okay.

Love you. Bye. Fuck.

Do I have some audacity to share? Would you like to hear the audacity? Uh, you say that, but why were you looking when I was on the phone being like, huh? Huh? What are we talking about? I think you want to know the tea.

Sit. So you know how my friend Paige has been seeing this new person for a couple of weeks? Well, they went round to Paige's last night, had a romantic dinner and some food.

Everything was going well. Then it came to sexy time. He took off her skirt and apparently was aghast that a woman with a fat ass would have big knickers.

Mm-hmm. So much so, he said, oh, I don't mind this time, but you know, you're going to have to change up. I'm not going to be impressed.

What the actual feck? How? Oh, I would have.

She is so beautiful and so yummy and scrumptious and amazing. And this goblin has the audacity to comment on her underwear? And you know what she did? I am so proud of her.

She yanked her skirt straight back up and said, get the fuck out. Oh, delicious. When women have self-esteem.

Oh, gorgeous. Eat more. Oh, oh, she made me so happy.

Because, you know, the amount of women that would just go, oh, I'm sorry, and just then let him have sex with them is terrifying and heartbreaking. It's because we're taught that women should be a myriad of ridiculous things. Oh, my God.

Thank God this girl has worked on herself. She's been to therapy. She's done all the stuff.

Oh, I'm so proud of her. That is why she's my friend. She knows, she knows that big booty deserves big knickers.

Exactly. You know the score. And I told her as a fellow member of the fat ass community, I support her.

Entirely with both butt cheeks. It's insane. A woman as gorgeous as her has to put up with this shit.

I'm sorry, but I cannot believe that this goddess had to deal with this. This absolute, I haven't even got words. I just cannot believe that a man would be like, I crave the fat ass, but I simply cannot comprehend a fat ass needing, you know, appropriately sized knickers.

What in the corn addicted dystopia is this? She's so wonderful and she deserves so much. Why does she have to deal with bottom feeders? But anyway, the point is, she survived, she thrived and she said, get the fuck out, you absolute loser.

I do feel incredibly passionate about this because so many people like it and it's insane. So you, you are a person of distinction because you saw my fat ass, saw the granny knickers and was like, fantastic. Love it.

Give me 17. Because, you know, I'm a girl who likes the comfies. I like my joggers.

I like my sports bra. I like my big granny pants. Do you know what I don't like? Thongs, aka the devil's ass string.

Not just because they're uncomfy, not because they're undignified, but also because they cause yeast infections and thrush and bacterial discharge and just, oh, they're so annoying. Have you ever worn a thong? Oh, you couldn't last a day.

That's what's insane. People are like, oh, it's so sexy. It's like the fucking irritating.

Do you know what is sexy? Feeling calm, confident, comfortable. What a novel concept.

A woman feeling relaxed and confident in her clothes. We couldn't have that. And here's the kicker.

She rang me to be like, oh, did I overreact? Did you react? No.

She reacted entirely appropriately. Get the fuck out. The audacity to criticize her underwear, which was clean, which was washed, which was perfectly appropriately sized.

And to be like, oh, this isn't going to do. Excuse me. I beg your pardon, fuck.

You have the opportunity to squeeze her pom pom and her butt butt and you go, oh, I don't like the packaging. The dating scene makes me want to scream. And thank you very much for allowing me not to be in it anymore.

I really do appreciate you and love you very much, but I just need to rage right now. The audacity of mediocrity. Actually, below mediocrity, sub mediocre fuckheads.

And you know what's that saying? He must have felt absolutely justified in what he was saying. Like, oh, no, like my manic pixie dream thought doesn't wear this.

Like, what the fuck? They don't come custom made, you ingrate. Oh, I'm sorry.

I'm sorry. I just. My friends are so gorgeous and they're so lovely and they've been to therapy and they have hobbies and they're so sweet and supportive, but they still have a sense of independence and self.

And it's just like, who are these options for them? It is so depressing. I'm sure a lot of people feel that way about their friends, but I'm actually right.

My friends are the shit. They are gorgeous and wonderful and scrumptious and they deserve the best. And they keep getting served fucking pond scum.

And I am so. No, I probably will calm down until she meets somebody nice. I just.

I can't believe people. Can you? You are far more neutral about people's shittiness than I am.

Teach me your ways. If you look so Zen and unbothered and I'm like. I can't stand it.

How dare these cretins come near her and the others are so beautiful and amazing and just not even their physicality, just everything about them is just so sweet and they smell nice and they're so thoughtful. And it's just like, fuck me, you deserve the earth and you're getting served. Pluto.

In fact, that is really disrespectful to Pluto. I will not say that. I'm sorry, Pluto.

I blame Korn for this. Well, not even Korn, just like everything about women and media and just this whole stupid idea about constantly being a playboy bunny down to fuck, but also only for one specific partner and only wanting to do that with one specific partner and just being a total virgin before you have sex. But somehow knowing exactly how to have sex in the best way possible.

What the fuck? It drives you up the wall. And I know there's nothing I can do about it apart from perpetuate my own kind, wholesome beliefs, but sometimes I just want to crack skulls and say, shut the fuck up.

Shut the fuck up. You will be lucky to get near one of those women. You will be lucky to breathe the same air, let alone touch their knickers.

They're perfectly proportionate sized knickers. Do you want yeast infections? Do you want some thrush on your face? Do you? Do you? No, then grow up and realize that she needs granny knickers.

You, you, you don't deserve the ass. And I know I'm raging, I know, but I just cannot believe the idiocy of the general popular sometimes. Huh? A fat ass doesn't need appropriately sized clothes to match? Oh, I don't know.

I know he's gone. She said exactly the right thing. She said, get the fuck out.

But I just I cannot believe I'm going to have to make her a basket with some self-care stuff and some chocolate and some granny pants and just be like, I see you. I respect you. I love you.

I have a partner that also appreciates granny knickers on fat asses. It's going to be OK. You are going to have to give her hope.

OK, I'm going to have to use you, take you as an example and say, look, look, they exist, OK? It's not embarrassing. Why is that embarrassing? Oh, it's your fault for being so sweet.

I can't help that you're the gold standard, OK? Well, it's your fault for being logical about women's underwear. I don't know what to tell you.

I love you. Thank you for understanding that my ass, as huge as it is, needs huge fabric to cover it.