❤️‍🩹 ☺️ I’m Asking You Out ☺️ ❤️‍🩹 (F4M) (Friend has a TERRIBLE Date) (Comes Home to You - Her Roomie) (Reverse Comfort)

Transcript

Would you like the Richter scale reading, or can I communicate it through grunts? Is it normal to want to cry after a first date? Cause that's what I want to do.

Oh, just everything that I feared it was going to be, it just. .. Oh, they say, go on, you never know, but I knew, I knew, I fucking knew.

And I'm annoyed at myself for even going. More fool me for being optimistic. Yes, more fool me, I'm just going to resign myself now.

That's it, at the ripe old age of 30, I have declared myself a spinster and a nun. Good day. Well, I don't have a cat yet, and I don't believe in God, but you know, it's a work in progress.

Nobody starts off an expert spinster nun, that just doesn't happen, I will not have these unrealistic expectations, okay? Stay one, leave me be. Oh, just everything was a backhanded compliment, and it was just.

.. Oh, I could just feel myself just completely disassociate from the experience and just be like, oh my God, this man hates me. Or at the very least he thinks he's better than me, and this just feels like I'm being dressed down in the worst possible condescending way.

And I'm not even enjoying the food. And I didn't even want to go to that restaurant, and then, then, then. ..

He opened his mouth about women as such this and this and this now, and it's so refreshing to meet someone who's not been out with loads of people, and it just. .. Because that's the way to get to a woman's heart, insulting all the other women around her that she loves and values and treasures most of all.

Brilliant. Mmm. I think some people actually think that works.

They believe that if they go, oh yes, your friend's fat, or, you know, your mother's this, and it's like, I love them. And unlike you, I enjoy their company, and they don't make me feel gross and intimidated and bleh. They make me feel loved and safe and valued for more than my body, and I just.

.. And of course none of that came out, I just said, oh, okay, see you later, because I don't want him to kill me. And maybe he wouldn't have killed me, maybe he wouldn't have, but I don't know that, and he's much bigger than me, and Jesus Christ.

Do you know what he said to me? He said, oh, I'm so relieved, you're just as pretty as your photo, and I thought, that's the biggest issue for him. That's what he was most worried about.

Was I as attractive as that photograph? Were his expectations going to be met physically? And what was my biggest worry? Is he going to kill me? Please don't stalk me, murder me, follow me home, please don't do any of those things, please, please, please.

And so far, no stalking, so count some blessings, but my God. Jesus H. Christ, oh my goodness, I am done.

I am kind of relieved. What does that say about me, and life, and people, and dating, and oh my goodness. Well, I'm sorry, and I'm coming back here, and I'm just going, you're clearly in the middle of something.

Do not nay say doomscrolling, it's more productive than what I've been doing for the last four hours. I got stuck, I went into freeze, some people always think it's fight or flight, no, it's freeze for me, I'm just like, oh my God, oh my God, I am so uncomfortable, I want to die. Or at least be trampled by elephants, and we don't have any elephants here, so you can see how I was just left in disappointment.

Oh, and I really tried, I really tried to keep the conversation going, and to ask him questions, he asked no questions about me, apart from, obviously, how many people have you been with. And when I said, oh, well, I haven't actually had a serious partner, and he was like, oh my God, you have no idea what a relief that is, because women nowadays, they just think that they're men, it's like, what does that even mean? What does that even mean? I know I don't think I'm a man, I just think I have the right to do what I want with my own body and go where I want, and not be murdered for it, how dare I and other women, how dare we?

Audacious witches. And I know, I know before you or my mother or anybody else says, you've got to keep trying, these aren't all men, I know they're not all men, I've seen the people that my friends are married to, they're very lovely, but they're married. And I am not, just seem to attract distasteful people.

Maybe it's me. Maybe it's me. Except, without sounding like a narcissist, I don't believe it's me.

Okay, I'm not, you know, the best thing in the world, but I'm also decent, and I try to be kind, and I ask questions, and I show a genuine interest, and, oh, goodness me. I want to use way more expressive language, but also I'm just like, there is no point in getting angry, because it just leads me to feel flat, and I don't want to feel flat, I want to just be resolute in my decision to become a spinster nun. And with a bit of eyeliner, I reckon I could rock that habit.

Cat eye sharp enough to slay some psalms, too. Can I please be really pathetic and sappy and ask you for a really big squeeze? Oh, I'm not brave, I'm daft.

I'm daft and foolish for even trying. It feels that way, it feels very much like, what did you expect, you silly woman? I'm just.

.. I know nobody wants to talk about it, and I know it's not, you know, fun or exciting and it puts a damper on things, and I totally get that, but I just really do think women would be more excited to date if they felt safer. I know.

Thank you for not immediately saying, well, you know, at least we're not in Afghanistan. It's like, I know we're not in Afghanistan, but that is still happening in the world, and the idea that countries don't influence each other is ludicrous. Of course they do.

And also, I could be in Afghanistan, and I could be living the life that those women have to live, and it's incredibly. .. I know it doesn't just happen to women, it happens to loads of people all around the world.

Slavery, oppression, hideousness, but I just feel like some people believe that's right and okay to hurt those people. And I can't do anything about it apart from flaccidly give some money every now and again and bring it up on dates and clearly kill the mood, and it's like, oh, you're not one of those feminists, are you? It's like, yes, yes, I am.

Happy to disappoint you at every turn, so. .. I'm okay with being a disappointment to some people.

I just don't get why women having freedom is seen as evil or against nature or scary or wrong or any of those things, but call me a crazy cat lady, because I'd rather be one of those than under anybody's thumb. But yeah, it doesn't really breed the right environment for romance, and I am depressing myself, and it's not the whole picture, and there are very kind men, and my stomach is growling because I couldn't eat at the restaurant because he was making me feel so sad and uncomfortable. And why didn't I say this to him? Oh, I know why.

Because I was scared that he might follow me home and kill me. And you already live here, and thus far you have not killed me or shown any interest in killing me or been weird with me, so it's a gamble I'm willing to take. I know.

And we can be spinsters together. Spinsters, minsters, winsters, whatever they're called. We can be it together.

How do you feel about cats? Mmm, I love you. Cats are always the correct answer, along with dogs and any other animal that is adorable.

I wouldn't have a cat if I had the space. Because the huge dogs are so sweet. Thank you.

For being you and listening and giving a damn. Not just being like, well, actually, it's so sad. It's okay for people with different experiences to feel sad.

Thank you. Because when I speak to you, I don't feel like you're going to roll your eyes and say, well, you know, it is what it is. Get over it.

At least you're a woman. It's like, yeah. Yeah, at least I'm a woman.

I know. It's like you can grapple in your mind the concept that, yes, men and women are different and they have different issues, but it's not a competition as to who has it worse. What an outstanding brain you have.

No, you really do. We should go on a date, you know. Platonic, romantic, I really don't give a toffee.

We should just go out to a restaurant we both want to go to. Not degrade each other or get in a competition about who has it worse and just be there, eating the food, laughing, sharing stupid videos and just being like, hey, enjoy spending time with you. Mm hmm.

A novel concept. I know. So I'm asking you on a date.

What do you say? Oh, if I have to beg. Why have you got a date with somebody else? Men say, yes, I don't seem like such a sad turnip.

Yes. Hmm. You can be my good day experience.

Because I need one. Otherwise, I'm just going to crawl into a hole. It took me like a year to work up to this day.

I need some positive feedback. I'm aware I'm very needy. Call me a lady of the night, but I have a need for positive engagement.

It's really hard to be a lady of the night. Cold, late nights. And you have to feign enthusiasm.

Who wants to do that? I'd be so bad at it. I'd be like, you know, like, oh, do you want this? And I'd be like, no, not really.

But financial circumstances have led me to this. The autistic lady of the night. Do you want this? No, but needs must.

I'm a very bad lady of the night. It's a good job I can type, I suppose. Although AI is encroaching, so, you know, never say never.

Although I would have to do some serious skill building.