I- I Wanna Be Subby

Transcript

Hi I'm so glad to be back home from work yeah I've just been wanting to come home and cuddle you all day here here can I scooch in next to you thanks come on snuggle into me it's alright honey I know you like being the little spoon just like that yep lay on my arm there you go yeah yeah work was a bit stressful but it's okay I got to come home and cuddle up to you so I literally couldn't care less about what happened at work right now you're always so warm you're like a like a walking heater can I put my hands under your shirt just your tummy I won't do anything I just here I'll just let you feel them for yourself I'm sorry honey I know how cold my hands can get sometimes but I can keep them there okay thank you hmm this is nice yeah I'm fine why did I do something wrong like what do you mean I'm more snuggly than usual I always cuddle you like this I what I how would you even know that I don't know no I'm not I'm serious babe like how in what way am I cuddling you like I want to be the one that's being held how does that work what does that even mean hmm well I mean yeah I guess I guess you're usually the one that nozzles your nose into my neck or stuff like that but I mean I wasn't I wasn't trying to I can move if you want or you know if it feels weird or something are you sure hmm okay okay no no I'm fine um here are my hands still cold I didn't want to touch your face cuz I didn't want to like get your face cold or anything but now that I can then I can grab your chin and I just want you to relax okay I don't want you to worry about me or anything hmm what thing the thing where I I have a thing what are you talking about I I do not act all caregivery when I want to distract you from something I act that way because I like taking care of you I what yeah yeah you do care for me it did I did I do something like to make you think that you weren't doing enough or something you are you're doing more than enough for me I you what are you you want to face me okay um here just let me move my arm oh yeah yeah you can talk to me about anything babe oh yeah I mean I mean I guess I would I have been a bit more stressed than usual but that's not it's not your fault if it's work hmm no no no it's nothing wrong I just um yeah I know I can tell you anything I you promise do you promise you won't be like disappointed or something like I mean like it's not what you like I you know how when we have sex and stuff that you're I'm usually the one that's you know taking control and everything and you know I'm usually the that you know does all the all the things and stuff like that um and I like doing that I'm not saying that I don't like doing that that's fun for me I like making you feel good I just um well I've I don't want you to be like like I said I don't want you to be disappointed or not I want you to not like me anymore or not like this side of me I guess I know what you're gonna say and you're gonna be like hey like I like all sides of you I love you you're my girlfriend right but like I know that already I know you're gonna say that and I just like I don't it's not your fault that it's like it's it's embarrassing like I don't want it's not normal for me and I don't want to make you feel like you're doing something that like like it's not something that like you did and it's not something that you made me feel like I couldn't talk to you about it's entirely my fault and I just for the last few days maybe a week or so I've been feeling really subby and I don't know how to handle that I don't know what to do about it cuz like and you know for the last week I've been at work I've been busy so it's something that I can just avoid talking to you about because we haven't really been having that much sex because again I've been busy and I'm really sorry for that but now that we're here and I have free time and with how you were you know grinding against me I figured that we were gonna have sex or something at some point since it's been a bit and I got nervous and I'm still a little nervous so I'm not looking at you um but now that I have to like think about it all right and then talk about it I don't know how to address that and I don't want you to feel like you have to like participate like you don't have to down me or anything if that's not something that you want to do I don't want you to feel like that's something that I want you to do if you don't want to do it like that's not how this works you you can just say no about it and we can like cuddle or something or watch movies or something like that I can't seem to force myself out of it like I've tried for a bit like I I watched porn and I tried to you know I tried to I tried to feel something like towards this you know the submissive person and like I couldn't I did that it was I mean it was it was nice to look at but I didn't you know I didn't think I wanted to dumb you like that I wanted to be in that situation where you were dumbing me like that and I couldn't I don't know how to you know I didn't know how you would think about me if I said that so I just I tried to get out of it all week and I and now that we're here I can't yeah that's that's it I'm sorry like I know this is like such a stupid thing to panic over and I just don't I don't okay um you don't have to have to I already said you know are you sure I don't want to make you feel like you have to do this or anything I just I've never done this before either so it's just kind of different for me I feel I feel a little weird about it um not in a bad way it's not your fault like not and like not in a way that's bad or saying that you did anything bad you didn't I just I'm just not I'm not used to it mm-hmm I want to be I kind of want to be put in my place like like I want you to tell me that I belong to you and you know like how sometimes I like I make you wear a collar and you know I kind of do stuff like marking you and you know giving you love bites and hickeys and stuff like that to make it so that you know you know that you're mine because it's like I want you to claim me like like I'm your property I want you to make me feel like I I don't I can't belong to anyone else I want you to pin me down and tie me up if you have to I just I just don't wanna I want to be I want to be subbie please I just I want to be subbie for you I want to I want to do what you tell me to do and I want to be good I want to be good and I want to make you I want to make you proud of me and I don't want you to feel like I I I don't want to be embarrassed about it anymore I just I do I do want to wear a collar like and I want to I want you to I don't want you to touch me everywhere I want to feel you your hands all over me and and I want to feel your lips all over me and I can't think I just I don't want to think I don't want to think anymore I just want to I want my head to be completely blank I don't want to have any thoughts I I don't want to have control over my own body I want you to I want you to have control over me I want to do whatever you tell me to please please I just oh yes it feels really good thank you for thank you for um letting me feel like this and be this way in front of you I feel really vulnerable right now I like it though I do I like feeling vulnerable for you and I like I like not having full control over her over my body I want you to have control over me please I I want you to yeah I can come sit in your lap it's are you sure are you are you sure you want to do this like seriously I I don't I know it's stupid I just don't want you to I want you to like me still I know I'm being really I'm acting really different right now I just okay okay this is okay what's that I mean I know what it is but what are you gonna do with it oh okay I can hold my neck up yeah yeah I can do that um like this is this okay hmm yes I like the bell um feels a little weird since it's usually on you but yeah I like it um what are you reaching for oh yeah I am it's okay hmm I can open my legs a bit more sorry my panties are already a bit oh yes yes it feels really good I can grind against your thigh while you have yeah um oh the have I better on me I oh sorry I can't really think right now oh yes I like grinding against your thigh yes it feels good sorry oh yeah oh yeah you can turn it up higher I would really like that please yes I want to be good for you I I want I want to be good for you and I want to I want to be able to make you feel good are you sure are you sure you don't want me to touch you I do do something I feel like I'm not doing enough and like I usually do I just okay okay okay I can I can just relax huh yeah um oh oh hmm you make me feel so good I just I never want to make you do feel like you're not.