Friend - 3am Conversation - Troubles

Transcript

Yeah yeah I know that's what I've been trying to say you know and it's very difficult to find people who think the exact same way or that at least agree but I'm glad you agree I mean how wouldn't you agree like my best friend ever so yeah look I got I gotta be point-blank with you you know we're best friends we've been best friends for a very long time and I gotta tell you what's the real reason why you told me to come over tonight what is it I can I can tell that something's wrong or that you want to talk about something or something's weighing you down you're stressed out about something what is it I'm here for you if you want me to just listen just tell me that I won't see a single thing I won't share whatever opinion I have if you do want me to tell you my opinion then I'll do just that what's going on what is it it's okay I'm not gonna judge I would never judge not you I'll judge other people but not you what is it well I see this has been something you've been struggling with a lot hasn't it no carry out go ahead and say everything you got to say I'm just here to listen yeah of course yes I can't imagine I can't but I can try Wow Wow that's a lot right look look is it okay if I if I speak if I give you my opinion on this would you like that okay well first off I want to start off by saying that everything's gonna be fine okay this is just stress that you're feeling it is completely normal and we all have stress every single day and it's okay now I'm just gonna start off by saying that I'm so happy that you shared this with me I'm so happy I really I really appreciate you telling me all this and you know it's something very intimate something that's been bothering you it's something that's been living inside of you just eating at you and it means the world to me that you would trust me with this and that you would tell me about it it tells me that you really care about me as a friend as well and that you think you can count on me and I want you to know that I will not take that lightly ever okay the next thing I want to really talk about with you about this is that I want you to you know answer this one question just one question why do you think you feel that way about this particularly you know specifically what you said why do you think you feel that way you know no go ahead and it's remember it's whatever you truly feel I don't want you to have this pressure right by society where you can't say certain things right now we're in a safe environment it's just you and me that's it nobody else the moment okay so what I want you to do is not even think about it it's just go in and say it why do you feel this way yeah that's it right there yep I know I know I completely understand okay because the prop not the problem what truly happens is that we aren't even in touch with our own emotions we don't even know what emotions we're feeling we're not taught to gauge what it is that we feel inside so or how to dissect those feelings to the deeper meanings did you know that anger is just a byproduct of feeling a deeper way deep deep down for example what I mean by that is anger is a surface feeling meaning that when you feel anger anger isn't truly an emotion it's a surface feeling that is at the very top but beneath it there is something that catapulted that anger you get what I mean let me give you an example let's say that you're very angry right with uh I don't know your mom right let's say that that's an example you're you're exceedingly angry with your mom and let's say that the reason why you got super angry like let's say you legitimately start screaming at her you're angry you say whatever it is that you say you know words that you don't even truly mean to say you just say them because you got to that point right when we look deeper down let's say that last week she meddled in your business she did something that really upset you however in that moment it exceedingly upset you but you put it in the back burner you you buried it deep down or you felt whatever emotion but it wasn't enough to cause the anger right now fast forward to today in this scenario and when she just told you to go take out the trash for example and you were gonna do it anyways but she asked you like she asks you every day that made you exceedingly angry anybody would think that what you're angry about exceedingly angry is literally the trash right but it's not what you're really angry about isn't really anger you're still sad or you feel betrayed by last week's actions that she made and you buried them and now they came out with a trigger which was the trash this scenario happens over and over and over again with anger whenever we feel angry we have to learn to center ourselves to calm down take deep breaths I don't know what it is about deep breaths by the way I'm gonna go on a tangent here because I think that this is something that's really weird have you ever truly done like deep breaths whenever you're upset they genuinely help like they genuinely do something to calm you down I don't know why but I have a I have a theory to why I think that is when you take that moment and you do those like that you know what I mean like because most people they'll like take a deep breath they'll go but then when they let it out they just go like you don't want to push it out in just one huge you want to make your mouth as small as possible like if you were about to whistle and you want to blow the air out with purpose so instead of going you want to go which takes forever and that will actually calm you down a lot more because it takes extra time which makes you actually calm down and really just Center yourself also I would do it with your eyes closed because then you can really concentrate so you should try that anyways I've got a little off topic there I'm sorry about that the point is that anger right that's the main thing it isn't actually an emotion it's an emotion that covers the true emotion that you're feeling and we haven't been taught to really dissect our emotions which is really important then you can truly know yourself and understand why you are feeling that way not just the angry that's covering the real emotion but the actual emotions you can find the problem and fix it that's very important the point is that whatever it is that you're feeling that that you're feeling right now because what's happening to you and all that it's gonna be okay and most of the emotions that you feel they're just covering the real ones so you really have to ask yourself what I was asking you at the beginning which was why why do you I feel that way or why do you feel that way and it will truly tell you the exact reason after you really dig deep and find it it's the important thing I'm just so grateful that you told me about this I don't know if that helps yeah somewhat okay yeah that's I'll take that I'm just trying to tell you what I try to do what really helps me in these cases you know it's really important specifically when you can count on yourself to deal with any problem that you might have that makes you self-sufficient which is important it's okay to get help but it's also really great to be able to count on yourself to figure out your own problems because sometimes you don't have people around to count on and that's not a bad thing just means you have to adapt so either way thank you so much for letting me come over and for getting together and just talking about stuff and I'm glad we got to dig deep on this and really help you out with your problems I hope this did help somehow but you know it helps me know too that you you care enough to share these with me so I really appreciate you telling me either way we'll get together next week or something else and we can just see what progress you know has happened see if you feel any better I might have some things I want to talk about that have been bothering me right now they're not that big but who knows what might happen in this next upcoming week nothing I guess anyways thank you so much and I'm gonna head out actually it's pretty late so yeah but but text me okay text me and we'll get together all right okay.