🫦 🤭 Ethical Slut 🤭 🫦 (F4A) (Friends to Lovers) (Friend Thinks She’s Ready to be a Slut) (Passionate Kissing)

Transcript

If people were nicer, I'd be such a slut. Oh god, yeah, I'd be up and down that pole, on people's faces, I'd be unstoppable. I would be.

.. I would be the champion of well-intentioned sluts. An ethical slut, mind you.

There will be no lying, no duplicitousness, no sneaking around, no, oh, let's just see, be like, no, I am interested in sex with you. I will be consensual, I will be respectful. Let's do this.

I will not give you STDs or get pregnant with your baby. I mean as much as I could avoid that, obviously. I'd make sure they were strapped, I'd make sure I was on the pill.

Apart from that, it's, you're putting a penis inside a vagina, you're taking a risk. But that is the beauty of being bisexual. Trying to impregnate me with your beautiful clit, lady.

You can't. You know, in some ways, I do think that more men should be gay and more women should be gay, you know. When you think about how men and women operate, men are far more in line with each other and so are women.

Like, men get angry and they're like, no, I'll have a wank and then I'll calm down. I've never known a woman be pissed off and be like, I need to have sex. That's a porn trope for women.

But for men it's like, calm down, calm down, take the penis out, stroke it, and then you feel better. For women it's like, I'm too upset, I'm too angry, I can't have a wank. However, I resent that whole wishy-washy, fluffy nonsense that we get too.

And like, women are so emotional, they need an emotional connection to have sex. It's like, what? I'm not being emotional at 2am when I'm grabbing my vibrator.

I'm the opposite of emotional. I am clinically calm and seeking that knockout orgasm that's just gonna make me all. ..

That's not emotional. That is bass. That is, I need to be asleep quick, give me the vibrator.

So yeah, in short, I think men should have sex with men and women should have sex with women. Oh sorry, I didn't make my point. My point was, men are like, usually more inclined with other men's sexualities and libidos.

They usually like more of a similar thing than the same for women. But again, it's crossover and, you know, I'm a horny bisexual, so what am I talking about? I invited you over for many reasons, but yes, one of them did include to bitch about my love life.

Oh, lack thereof, of course. Ah, and another reason is, I really love you. Cause you're such a good egg and you brought wine.

The sugary kind that's basically just diabetes in a bottle. I love you very much. Because instead of giving me a lecture on what real alcohol is, you just said, here you go, here's your shit, wine and joy.

Cause instead of condescending to you, I'm just going to accept that that's what you like. That is good egg behavior. Teach my exes.

In fact, actually, no, no, that's for them to do. They need to go to therapy. They need to understand what human empathy is.

They don't get you as a teacher. No, I'm not having it. Not on your life.

You're my friend, not theirs. I found you first. I saw you through all your awkward stages for staying with me.

And you didn't even like any of my exes, so there. I'm not really sad about them. I'm just sad about dating in general.

Cause it all feels a bit bleak. But then I don't want to be a self-pitying asshole. It's like, what's the point? It's like, I just don't want to be that person.

Who's like, woe is me and I will never taste good puss or cock again. But it's so easy to be that person. That's why millions of us take up the role.

Somebody fucked me and make me feel better. No, I don't practice basic hygiene or look after myself or do anything worthwhile. And that was just a joke.

I obviously do do those things. Well, I definitely brush my teeth and wash my hair. So, you know, basically all of it.

Maybe I should just be a slut. And why is that funny? I'll have you know, I could be an excellent slut.

Queen of Slutdom. Whore of Babylon. Harlot and Scarlet.

I can't think of any more rhymes to do with being a whore, but you get my point. I could be good at it. Of course I am.

I have all the key attributes. My amigas are pleased and desperate for human touch. What more do you need? If only people were kind.

That is the one part of slutdom I do not partake in. Yeah, you take that, you dirty little slut. It's like, hey, I am a very clean little slut.

And I don't like your tone. It's the biggest turnoff in the world when a dom thinks, ah, the only way to dom is to humiliate. It's like, nah.

Nah fam. Lack of imagination all around. Three stars.

Out of a hundred, a good day. And I know some people are into that and they like to be told that they're a this, that, and the other, but I just, it's like, why? Why are you being mean to me? You're inside me.

This feels contradictory. Oh, that's true. Not everybody's, you know, into that whole, suck it, slut, suck it.

It's like, couldn't it just be more like, if you wouldn't mind, would you consider being a slut? If you wouldn't mind, would you consider popping my penis in your mouth? Well, at least that's respectful.

I can't stand any of that dirty little slut gets what she deserves. It's like, oh, does she? Does she really? It reeks of a system that diminishes both men and women in different and depraved ways.

We do not speak its name. It's become like society. It just doesn't even sound like a word anymore.

Fuck the established ruling system that makes men angry and women not have rights. That makes men sad too, even though apparently they're not allowed to say that, which is like, well, anyway. Back to the sex.

We were talking about the sex. I could be one of a kind. I could be an ethical slut.

And I could find more ethical sluts who just wanted to have sex and were very kind and respectful and were like, okay, this is what you like. This is what I like. We'll meet in the middle.

Fab. But then a part of me is like, this is just a huge coping mechanism to deal with the fact that you feel you're never gonna meet anybody you truly love or like. And would it inevitably just make me feel even more alone? Not because I believe that sex is wrong, because I don't, or that for women it's different, because again, I don't think it's that different.

Maybe there is some slight difference because men and women are different. But do I believe that sex diminishes a woman but not a man? No.

But I imagine if you had it with lots of different people, it could make you feel strange or confused or lonely. So. ..

Oh, fuck it. I just want to be in love. And there's nobody to be in love with.

Because I don't go outside or on dating apps. And people are scary. And I'm a slut, but it also takes me a long time to get to know someone and feel comfortable to have sex with them, so that would also be a monkey wrench in the ethical slut plan.

I feel like a mixed-up chameleon. Do you think I'm stupid? Are you dating anyone? Of course, I want to have some hope.

Well, since you're not, you can answer this question without feeling weird. Would you have sex with me? Just, like, objectively, if you, like, saw me and was, like, you know.

.. Would you have sex with me? Free and not my friend? Would you be like, hmm, I do things to that orifice.

Yes or no, damn you? Do you actually think I'm pretty or are you just being put on the spot? Yes, I want an honest, honest, autistic answer.

I'm objectively very fuckable. That is so sweet, thank you. I think the same about you.

Oh, no, I wouldn't. I have plenty of friends who I really enjoy spending time with, but I do not want to be naked with. No, no, no, like, no.

I didn't mean, like, I want to be naked with you, it's just. .. No, not that there'd be anything wrong with being naked with you, just.

.. Well, you are very objectively fuckable. Eh.

I said what I said. Good, well. ..

I'm glad that's good to know. I'm not being weird. You're the one that was asking all the clarifying questions.

I'm not going red, I'm just hot. I'm not going red, I'm just hot. I must have had the sugary wine in this summer and reasons.

This is not evidence as to why I would not be a successful slut. It's just because we're talking about you and me and it's strange. I could be a very successful slut, thank you.

And I think it's a detriment to our friendship that you don't believe in me. All my power's in slutdom. A real friend would believe.

You. .. You believe I would try.

You. .. So-and-so of a so-and-so of a.

.. Probably very nice woman. Okay! I'd make a terrible slut in theory.

And in practice and every other way, okay? Well, I at least have the mind of a whore. You can't take that away from me.

It's like I've got constant sex going on in my head and I'm just like, oh, an orgasm would be nice. That would really just finish off the day. And yes, your hand gets you so far and it does the job, but someday you just want someone to take your tits in their face and just.

.. You know? This is meant to be a judgment-free zone.

Do not shame the slut. I'm so contentioned and confused. I'm gonna get that as a sign and put it around my neck.

That'll show you. Oh, does it? Does it just sound like I want to date someone? Well, ha, bloody ha, the joke's on me then, isn't it? Because where is this someone? Where is someone who's not obsessed with the amount of bodies you've buried or how much money you make or what friggin' colour you like?

Why can't they just be like, you're fairly attractive and I enjoy spending time with you and it doesn't deplete my battery. Let's spend our lives together. And I'm not saying that in a defeated and romantic way.

That's romance to me. I love you, I like you, think you're cool, let's just have sex occasionally and eat food together and grow old. That's not mortal life, is that? Oh, piss off with you, it's gonna happen when you least expect it.

I've spent many years not expecting anything that's never happened, don't you? I know you're just trying to be a good friend and be supportive and show an interest and I'm sorry that I'm slightly taking it out on you but I just. ..

Oh, God. Can't you just have sex with me? Or at least just touch me and tell me I'm pretty.

Yes, I'm red, I'm red all over and it's summer and I've had wine and I just. .. You're so nice.

Actually, fuck that, you're not nice. Sometimes you're very rude and honest but you are never cruel. You are kind for the sake of being kind you have your own moral compass and you're just.

.. objectively very fuckable. So you can see why I'm frustrated with this staying at friendship.

And yes, I'm mortified saying this yes, I'm red, yes, I'm just. ..