Comforting My Doctor Sweetheart

Transcript

Hey, sweetheart, um, look, I'm sorry, I was not trying to invade your privacy, but when I was downstairs, your phone got a text, and, uh, I, I, I happened to see the notification. Well, I know, I know you don't mind me seeing your notifications, but I, I still, you know, I want to respect your privacy, I don't want to go reading them and, and make you feel like I'm spying on you or anything, but that's not why I came up. Well, the notification was a bit cryptic, but it seems like something may have happened at work today.

I was just wondering if there's anything you want to talk about. Of course, baby, I've always got time to talk to you. Hey, hey, this, this is not what I was expecting, um, look, it's okay, just let it out if you need to.

No, don't apologize, you're fine. Sweetheart, you are right here with the man that loves you the most in the whole world. Baby, I'm your husband, it's my job to take care of you.

Just, whatever it is that happened, I'm sure there's a solution. I'm sure that we can make it right. Baby, baby, it's okay.

Sweetheart, I really can't, I can't understand you, I'm not trying to be difficult, I just, when you're crying this hard, I just, I can't understand what you're saying. No, no, no, don't apologize. Just let me hold you.

Put your head on my chest, it's okay. It's okay, we'll take care of it together. You're not alone, you're not alone in whatever's happened at work.

I'm sure that there's a way we can make it right, it's okay. Just take some deep breaths with me, okay? We're gonna relax, we're gonna release this.

Okay, we're gonna do this together, are you ready? Breathe in with me. And out.

No, no, no, control your breathing, control your breathing, it's gonna help you feel better. It's gonna help you get under control, all of you, okay? Take a deep breath in.

And out. It's okay. Lover, you're, you're gonna be all right.

Everything is gonna be fine at work. Just relax. Let that pain go, whatever's bothering you.

We can talk about it now if you want to, or you can just relax with me here, and I'll just hold you, and we can continue to work together, okay? You can come back to it when you're ready, okay? I don't mind either way, it's all right.

Whatever you need. Okay, you, you feel ready to talk about it? You sure you don't need any more time? All right.

So, tell me, what, what was it that happened that has upset you so badly? That's fine, you can tell me whatever you want. If you get into a bunch of medical jargon, I'm not gonna really understand what you're talking about, but you can tell me what happened.

So, it was, it was, uh, with a patient? Well, no, I just thought maybe you'd had, like, an argument with someone, or someone that you worked with had been nasty to you, something like that. But, um, I mean, obviously, I've never been in the situation that you were in today.

I can imagine, I can imagine how that would be, though, and it makes more sense to, um, why it bothered you so badly and affected you as deeply as it did. Oh, because you're very empathic, sweetheart, you're, you're strong, and I, I, I, I, I didn't really see you being that upset over an argument or a nasty interaction, but something bad happening with a patient, yeah, that, that makes a lot more sense. So, what happened? Okay.

Mm-hmm. Yeah. And did this get noticed, like, right away, or, or did it take a while for someone to pick up that this was happening?

Um, okay. Hey, I understand. Look, you're really good at what you do.

You're really good at what you do, and I'm really good at what I do, and I'm really good at what I do. You're really good at what you do, really, really good, and I'm so proud of you. Even, even with something like this, okay, because, first off, could you have done anything differently to have a, a different outcome with this patient?

I don't know, that's something that you're gonna have to answer. And it can be hard. If the answer is yes, that you could have done something differently, it can, it can be really hard to have to face that, but it's the right thing to do.

It's the right thing to do, baby, because you can learn, and you can grow, and get even better at what you do. And even if the answer is no, you couldn't have done anything better, there's probably still stuff you can learn from the experience, and I'm proud of you because I know you well enough to know that you're already doing that. You're already asking yourself those tough questions that you may not want to know the answers to, and I know that you're brave enough to face the answers.

I know that you're strong enough and smart enough to learn the lessons that you can learn from this, and improve and grow, and turn those answers and those lessons to the benefit of another patient down the line. Every day you go to work and you help people, you save lives, you make a difference for people. I'm more incredibly proud of you than you can possibly imagine.

And even if there's something you could have done differently to have this patient have a better outcome, you know what? You're still gonna forgive yourself because that's also the right thing to do. No, I'm telling you, I require this.

You need to forgive yourself. It's okay to learn, it's okay to self-evaluate and say, you know what? I could have done a better job, you know, assuming that is true.

Again, I don't know. Could have been you did everything that you could have done. Anyway, you can learn, you can self-evaluate, you can hold yourself accountable if there were mistakes that were made, but then you also have to let yourself off the hook.

Because it's the only way that you're going to be able to reset and go back in and do this again, the job that you do. You forgive other people when they make mistakes, don't you? Even when it results in a bad outcome with a patient? Great, then you can't refuse to forgive yourself.

You need to show yourself that you can do it. Great, then you can't refuse to forgive yourself. You need to show yourself the same charity and generosity and compassion that you show to everyone else.

And you really do show it, you show it every day. Sweetheart, I can only imagine what you're going through right now. I can only imagine what you're going through.

Just know that your husband adores you, okay? And I am so proud of you. I'm so proud to be yours.

No, it doesn't make me think less of you. The fact that you care, that's a good thing. It's a really good thing.

Remember that you're not going to win every battle in this job, okay? As you've said to me before, the game ends the same way for all of us in the end, right? And despite everything that you do, sometimes it's just someone's time to go.