Cin City Life Ep 20

Transcript

Hello, I'm back again with, it's not a hot take, it's a very obvious take, from when I was watching a TV show, it's called Insecure on Netflix, how obvious, of course, anyway, it's about, it's about these women approaching their 30s, their dating lives and stuff, as I'm only like one episode or two episodes in, I do like it, but there was a monologue by this girl who just got dumped by someone, and let me quote, it's like, it doesn't matter what I do, if I'm into them, I'm too smothering, if I take my time or give them space, oh, I don't think you're into me, fine, sex right away, lose interest, wait to have sex, lose interest, if I don't have sex at all, motherfucker, no, I'm a grown ass woman, I did not sign up for this bullshit, and I'm like, this woman is talking about my past fucking year, dating a guy for two months, not have sex, he goes psycho, and we like don't see each other again, if I don't show enough interest, they fucking disappear, if I show too much interest, oh, she's clingy, that's a red flag, like, if I have sex with them, then, oh, she's easy, I don't want that, what the fuck am I supposed to do, and I like sex, what if I want to have sex, what the fuck is a woman supposed to do, I know this is, it's not like, sometimes people say, oh, you're just bashing men, I date men, I don't date women, I can't comment on how women behave when dating, you know, I know that they're not much better, that they do the goose thing as well, they do shit as well, it's fine, I can't do anything about that, I'm a woman, I only have experience, I'm a straight woman, I only have experience with men, straight men mostly, so, you know, I can't comment on what women do, I can only comment on my own experiences, but yeah, fuck this, I'm so fucking tired of not knowing what to do, and we're living a new era of influencers on TikTok and YouTube and Instagram and wherever, in these shorts, trying to tell you how to behave with someone, how to seduce a man, how to make sure a man is into you, I don't want to, I don't want to play fucking mind games, I don't want to have to behave a certain way to seduce someone, I want that someone to like me for who I am, I don't want to be listening to these fucking influencers and life coaches telling me what's the right way of dating, everyone should have their own way of dating, and yeah, maybe I'm doing it all wrong, because look at me, I'm still single, but I just think it's so fucking toxic that people will try to tell you that what you're doing is not right, and you shouldn't do it that way, because then they will lose interest and you're doing this and you're doing that, okay, obviously, in some level, there is, there are certain things that you should obviously be cautious of, like, don't behave toxically and stuff like that, but these people are in no way qualified to give you this advice, that a fucking dating coach, who told you to be a dating coach, what sort of qualifications do you have, just because you have a relationship, just because you've been through shit, I've been through shit, it's not like I'm going to tell people what to do, what's the right way to do, what's the wrong way to do things. When I met my previous boyfriend, and that was a really long relationship, a lot of years, and it was a good relationship, yeah, it didn't last, but that's okay, not everything has to last, we were together for a very long time, we were happy, we had a life together, and we didn't end it on bad terms, but anyway, when we met, I was honest, I was communicating, I told him, like, three or four dates in, like, look, I'm kind of dating for a relationship, I don't want to take this casually, and that was it, we were together, so, you know, not everyone, not everyone is ridiculous, not everyone needs to be played with, with fucking mind games, like, you have to stay cold, you have to, you can't text them every day, because that's bothering, that's too much. In this modern environment, when you're constantly texting people, and texting everyone and sending memes to everyone, yeah, I know, not everyone is like that, but I'm like that, and most of the people I date are like that, like, they like to stay in touch, they like to, you know, send each other a little message every day, like, oh, look, it's a meme, it's funny, because I thought you'd laugh, because I know your sense of humor, it's, I know it's the bare minimum, but I like that, I'd much rather have that than a phone call every two days, I don't like fucking phone calls all the time anyway, I just, yeah, okay, I just really wanted to talk about this TV shoot, because I thought, man, it's like the Barbie monologue, if you've seen the Barbie movie, you have to be thin, but not too thin, you have to be pretty, but not too pretty, because then you're, you must remember that if you've seen the Barbie movie, if you haven't, you have to, and, you know, if you don't agree with that monologue, then you maybe, you shouldn't be listening to me, because you must know that I'm kind of for feminism and everything, I think the Barbie movie was great, and I don't think it was that deep, because people are like, oh, it's propaganda, it's not propaganda, it's the truth, you know, it wasn't bashing, man, it was comedy, you don't have to take things too seriously, but you can still find meaning in them, anyway, this little monologue, even though it was a lot shorter, it reminded me of that, that no matter what you do, it's not good enough, no matter how you do things, it's just not right, it's not good, but, I mean, it's probably her fault, and my fault, for not dating the right people, for not having found the right people, but, you know, eventually we will, it's just fucking exhausting, it's really, really exhausting, that every time I feel like, oh, he seems like he's, I'm not gonna say he's the one, because I don't believe that there is just one one, I believe that there are a lot of people you can fall in love with, I believe there are a lot of people you can find common ground with and be happy with them, you just have to, you know, you have to find them, but every time I find someone like that, that I think, oh, this could be something, it is something for a while, and then something goes wrong, and I don't know what goes wrong, because if I knew, I would fix it, but I don't know, should I be fixing things, no, I should just be myself, and I should find someone who accepts me for who I am, mic drop, thank you, I'm sorry, I need to get this out of myself, love you all.