Call of the Kaiju

Transcript

Good evening, this is Riordan Gamzee reporting live from the heart of a city under siege. We are witnessing an unprecedented event, as two massive creatures known as Titans are engaged in a destructive battle. The scene here is chaotic as these colossal beings wreak havoc upon the urban landscape.

Authorities are urging citizens to evacuate immediately. We are currently in the midst of what can only be described as a clash of the Titans. The scale of destruction is unimaginable.

Both appear to be Godzilla. This is our first realization that there is in fact more than one reptile at large. Eyewitnesses report that these Titans appeared seemingly out of nowhere, both rising from the depths of the ocean at different points.

Their battle has brought the city to its knees. This is Brock Brockman, the eye in the sky, here reporting on the traffic, weather, and today the kaiju clash happening in the middle of our fair city. With a bird's eye view here, I can tell you it's looking like mayhem.

Ring the bell! This main event is set to go to anyone. We're looking at two well-matched kings of the ring here.

On a more serious note folks, from where I sit, these Titans mean business. Get yourself and your loved ones to safety as soon as you can. This is not going to be pretty.

Brock Brockman, back to you. Experts are scrambling to determine the origin and nature of these creatures after the sudden appearance of a second. Previous eyewitness reports and documented sightings initially led experts to believe there was only one creature.

It now appears there are many. The military is currently mobilizing to contain the situation. To what effect against these titanic adversaries remains to be seen.

I don't know how we could have missed this. Two Godzillas? How did we not see this? One is larger than the other clearly.

More muscular? Thicker thighs, tail? I'm not sure how we could have mistaken one for the other.

But when only one giant is seen at a time, we don't tend to think that there are more than one. Thanks for thinking of this observation deck. These glass walls are perfect for keeping us protected for the most part, but still able to see the action as it were.

I'm smitten, fascinated. My interest in Godzilla? Well, he's the perfect specimen really, isn't he? I mean, look at him.

The size, the power, king of the monsters, king of the kaiju, the alpha titan. He is dominance. Raw primal instinct, territorial and, well at least until now, a lone survivor.

The bad boy of the big boys, if you will. Wait, wait a minute. What's happening here? No.

It can't be. Okay, there's some kind of cloud forming, like, uh, see that over there? Look, it's like a mist.

Oh shit, it's spreading. Oh god. It's pheromones.

Fuck. They're not fighting, they're fucking. That's a female! No, no, no, no, I'm fine, I don't need to step back.

The glass is strong. It's gonna hold anything thrown at it. Look, shit, I can't believe I missed this.

How could I have overlooked this? All those buildings destroyed, homes of thousands of people. He's asserting dominance, alright, but it's foreplay.

Look, he's going to mate with her. I know it's foreplay. Listen, I cut my teeth on the Crocs in the Northern Territory.

You haven't lived until you've come eye to eye with them whilst they make the prehistoric beast with two backs. Do you understand? Shit.

Oh, that's a new one. He's breaking off that building and. ..

Oh my. Okay, he appears to be preparing her to mate. He's stretching her.

The entire building is now inside of her. Oh fuck. Oh, this is not at all standard reptilian behaviour.

He's winding his tail around her. He's preparing. Oh god.

Look. Look! His phallus.

Shit. Multiple. Multiple have emerged.

Oh god, he's huge. He has two giant cocks. Oh fuck.

Oh, the pheromones are spreading. Fight it. Fight it.

Gods, it's going to infect the city. Oh, the cloud is. ..

The cloud is coming. .. The cloud is coming over the top of the barrier.

Oh god. Oh god. Oh, this.

This is something else. I feel quite warm. All of a sudden.

Oh, lightheaded. Oh, thank you. You caught me.

My hero. But your back is against the glass, don't you? See? It is strong.

So, yeah. So, yeah. New information has been released on why there are two titans of the same apparent breed clashing.

Experts say that they are in fact attempting to ensure the continuation of their species. What that means for the human race is unknown. But for now, we can bask in this once-in-a-lifetime spectacle of Mother Nature unfolding.

In related news, reports of toxic pheromones being released into the atmosphere are coming in. Health authorities advise the wearing of breathing apparatus where possible. Safe from an underground bunker, we are receiving reports that the monsters are actually mating.

They aren't fighting for dominance, but reproducing. Wait, live. An incoming announcement from the science team at Monarch.

Yes, yes, there is penetration. The beasts are mating. It appears that the titans are preparing to engage in coitus.

I repeat, copulation is occurring. Do not panic. This is not a drill.

A drill is an object commonly used to make holes inside solid objects such as walls. This, on the other hand, is two gigantic beasts having kinky, kinky, sexy, lovey times. It is quite disturbing.

I'm. .. I'm not aroused.

Brock Brockman, the Eye in the Sky here, reporting on the traffic and weather. As we approach 9am, you'll notice your drive into work this morning has been interrupted by two giant dinosaurs mating in the center of our fair city. Quick weather report, cold showers are expected by lunchtime which will hopefully put a stop to lizard love time.

Speaking of, I wonder if there is a market for Godzilla-sized prophylactics. If not, there sure should be. We don't really need more of these things roaming around.

Brock Brockman, back to you. Oh, oh, goya. Clay shovel? I don't care whether this is the pheromones or not, I don't realize how attractive you actually are.

Your eyes are stunning. So strong, holding me tightly, huh? You caught me from falling.

You know. .. Amid all this destruction, this chaos, I feel such a need.

Oh fuck. That's it, put your hands right here. Fuck the clothing.

Oh gods. Just destroy me. Breed me for the love of the lizard.

Take me. Godzilla has started to show signs that he's charging. The infamous blue light that has started to glow at the end of his tail spikes is currently growing in intensity.

Silence deafening down here in the bunker where a vast number of people are safe for now. Attempts at intercourse have been made between consenting parties, and we have now moved the children and the elderly to a visually protected area as the pheromones make their way into the ventilation system. I, for one, need to highlight just how potent these are, and I'm feeling the effects myself.

I can't hear you. The beast has broken off the top of a skyscraper and appears to be using it as a. ..

No, I can't read this out on air. It would ruin me. I can't say this.

Fine. Using it as a rectal insert on the other beast while penetrating it, we cross live to our correspondent who was on the top floor of that very building. God have mercy on our souls! It's horrible! The terror! The absolute all-encompassing horrors of it all! No! Don't look out the window! Tell Marjorie.

I love her. Oh. Oh.

Oh, God. Yes. The cold glass, pressed hard against my nipples, pointed at him.

Oh, this. Oh, this view. Oh, you're fucking me.

It's perfect. It's everything. Deeper.

Fuck me harder. That's it. Yeah.

Oh, fuck. Breathe me. Breathe me like he's breathing her.

Oh, God. Oh, God. He's like.

.. He's stimulating her ass. Oh, boy.

I'm impressed. Oh. Oh, see.

Oh, I knew I liked you when I met you. Oh, I knew we were on the same page. Oh, I could see a similarity in drive.

Oh, primal instinct between you and him. You wanna. ..

You want me to get your fingers all nice and wet so you can stick them inside my ass while you fuck me like he is to her? Well, if it's good enough for them. Yeah.

Okay. Oh, careful now. It's been a while.

Yes. I want it. Yes, I can take it.

My dear. I have a Kaiji-sized reptilian dildo at home that makes itself quite comfortable in all of my holes regularly. It's just been a little while since I had such an occupancy.

Oh, fuck yes. The tide. That's because.

.. I am full. Full of your thick, magnificent cock and deep searching fingers.

Oh, right there. Faster? Harder? Oh, look.

Oh, he's gonna blow. Oh, God. Oh, God.

Oh, fuck yes. I'll break me. I'll steal me.

I'll take me. I'm all yours. Play me.

Make me. Make me your bitch. Yours.

All yours. Oh, fuck. Yes.

Oh, I swear. You both. So damn impressive.

Well, that is indeed a first. Powers previously thought to be only for destruction also used for creation. Godzilla's atomic powers work in both ways and what we've just witnessed was nothing short of amazing.

Reports are coming in thick and fast that most evacuations were successful. We've received no reports of lives lost and minimal injuries. Stay tuned for updates on casualties and for more information as the situation develops.

For now, as always, we can only rebuild and wait to see what happens next with these giant creatures we've gotten so used to sharing our planet with. Godzilla has planted the seed of a new generation and I'd hastily add many a seed for the new generation has been sown this afternoon in our fair city. So call me after seven, okay? But I'll be seeing you Saturday, yeah? Well, that was certainly an event.

We witnessed the build-up the atomic breath of pending doom lighting up each and every spine on Godzilla's back until the energy was released not out of his mouth in a stream of nuclear destruction but in a stream of seminal fluid that flooded his female counterpart in the streets of downtown. The. ..

cleanup will be ghastly. I swear it's been a day. Sorry, what's this? They survived! Quickly, can we get a connection back? We've made it! We've made it! I'm coming home, Marjorie and I'm ready to talk about your hemorrhoids, darling.

I love you. I love you, too.